How to experiment your way to success!!
Get the life you want and in this video I show you how!
Using a technique used by successful corporate giants such as Apple to your own personal advantage to achieve what you want.
Enjoy and remember "Be Brilliant" :)
As promised see the link to Simon Sinek's TED talk it is awesome. Please remember to visit my YouTube channel and like and subscribe if you have not done so yet.
Also don't forget to subscribe to my news letter which you will find on my about page.
Click here to see Simon Sinek's amazing TED talk.
Click here to subscribe to my newsletter!
Also don't forget to subscribe to my news letter which you will find on my about page.
Click here to see Simon Sinek's amazing TED talk.
Click here to subscribe to my newsletter!
How to create New Year resolutions from 2016 onwards that really connect with you, so you can live the life you want to live with passion and purpose.
Be brilliant and enjoy :)
How to stay committed to your purpose!
In this video I will show you how to:
Welcome back again guys and as promised I am going to deliver another great video.
I am really pleased, as I have just started to do live broadcasts on Periscope, you guys have really been involved in this, thank you to Mathew Jesso for your support.
Welcome to our new viewers and my loyal subscribers, I just want to say a massive thank you for subscribing.
I am still doing stuff on Facebook and we are now up to 99 likes which is amazing (by the way I have just checked, as of 1.7.16 that is up to 175!), in a very short space of time. I really want to thank all you guys for getting involved in that.
So why I am doing this video? I am doing it for you guys, I really want to help you achieve your goals. One of the massive things we do every year is make new year resolutions. You say “ I am going to do this or I am going to do that” You make a promise to yourself and you don’t really keep it; ( yes I have done this myself, you are not alone!) Some of you might not break them, but some of you do, generally people do break them. For example, people who go to the gym; for the first three months everyone is at it, but after that it all tails off.
What this is all about is for you to have a resolution that really means a lot to you. What I mean by this is that you could have just one or two that really connect with you. So when you think about your resolution you need take action every day that feeds into your resolution. It is not just a case of promising yourself for example “ I am going to lose weight” we will talk about this later in the video. What this is about is really connecting with your true passion and what you really believe in. I truly believe that everyone has value to add to the world and this is where you come in; because a lot of us think about “ well, what is my passion? What is it that I want to share with the world?” This is what this purpose or your journey is all about!
New Years resolutions are a brilliant way to get started, you have a brand new clean slate and you can start again ensuring that you stick with it.
The first thing to think about is:
What are your values? What drives you and what is your passion? You need to identify what sort of person you think you are? (whoever you think you are you will become) So if you think you are a negative person you will always be negative because you are thinking negative. So this is where you can do the self work to start to change those thoughts; you can start to think you are a positive person. You can do it; you can think of the good things that come out of a negative situation ( this is all about framing it in a way that benefits you and does not hinder or hurt you) The way you frame it is up to you; the choice is absolutely yours. Part of this is identifying yourself what drives you and what your value system is. (Remember in my previous videos I talked about your power of choice!)
Values - What is important to you? What makes you get fired up? What makes you get out of bed and go “Wow I want to smash this today!” What makes you do that? Is it that you want to own a company? Do you want to run a company? Do you want to be a manager? Do you want to be happy? Whatever it is, you can absolutely do it. But you have to identify what is it that works for you; that is really, really important because if it does not connect with you, you are never ever going to keep to that resolution that you made to yourself!
This is a question, when we make a resolution are we giving ourselves permission to break it? Again, if we do this it is because we are not really invested in the resolution ( we don’t believe it for some reason and only you know that reason!) So you really have to be invested in it, you have to believe it and you have really, really got to want to do it! This ties into how you really feel, a lot of this is about being 100% honest with yourself. But at the same time you must be kind to yourself. You can break a resolution and start again, the key here is that you have not started all over again; you would have already taken some steps towards what you want to achieve; you need to recognise those steps that you have already taken. So you pick up from those steps you have taken and continue to build from that point onwards. You never ever go backwards, you just move forward at different rates. You may be moving slower for a time. If you go back and review what you have done, you can review that and think I can do slightly better next time, so that way you are building on those successes. So that is what is really important.
People do things like weight loss, and they say “oh no I have put weight on again” in reality you have actually become an improved version of yourself as you tried to lose the weight; you did lose some weight and yes you did put it on again, but you did lose the weight. This means that you are a better version, because the person you were before you thought about losing the weight had not lost any weight, so you have moved forward; you don’t go backwards. The fact that you have lost weight means you can do it again and persist. This means you are building that strength needed to keep moving forward.
Think about this for a moment; we go to the gym or we go running and we do this so our muscles get stronger and part of this is putting your mind in a mind gym. This is the same as building muscle, we build strength into the way we think by practicing! If you keep working at it, it will work. it is like anything, some of us will get it straight way and will persist. For some of us it takes much more time and we need to keep persisting and trying. Sometimes it needs a lot of effort to apply this everyday, putting your mind in that gym and practicing every day those things you believe in, and what you want to achieve.
So let me give you a few more steps you could use.
You may ask how do I identify what drives me? You know when you do something that makes you feel excited, well that is what it is! They key then is to think, what was it about that (what I just did) that got me excited? Well, this is a great little tool you can use.
1 - Write out 25 things that you love and that you are passionate about.
2 - Whittle the list down from 25, to 5 things that you love and are passionate about.
If you do this, it will give you a really good idea about what you are passionate about or what drives you. So you have 25, you get rid of 20 and you are then left with your top 5! The 5 things you have on your list are the things that are going to drive you to do whatever you want to do. So if you have been truthful with yourself they will be absolutely amazing. It may that you have put “I love being with my family; it may be doing exercise; whatever it is, you would have done the work to identify your key drivers. For me, one of my drivers is helping people, and that helps to drive me to create these videos for you.
So now you have your 5 drivers; you can then start to build your one or two new year resolutions! Just pick one or two and don’t overwhelm yourself, as you want this to be achievable for you. Start small and if you get some great traction then great you can then increase them. It is up to you how you manage this and how you make yourself responsible. Ask yourself a question “What do I think is achievable for me right now?” So you may want only one, so you absolutely nail it which will create momentum for you to achieve other goals you have in mind, Or you can build on the resolution you have and make it better or more challenging so you have a base to work from. You know what I talked about in my previous videos about having a mission statement, or a vision about what you want to be or how you want to be as a person; this can tie into that; absolutely! So if you tie this into your mission or vision then this will be even more powerful!
So once you have done this, what I want you to do is to record, or proof what you are doing or have done. So part of that today could be that “You are watching Joe Noya’s video!” (That is an action you can record right now as you are doing it) So build up a journal or something you can refer to, perhaps you might record a video blog, like this where you can record what you are doing. So when you are feeling in that zone, you may feel a great high as you actually try these techniques, then you may get lows; when, or if you hit thought lows you can go back to your records, to check and see how far you have come since you started to carry out your resolution. (this will give you increased motivation to keep persisting!)
Think about our gym example; if someone has been down the gym for three months and then they say “I cannot be bothered now!” that is the time to look at what you have recorded! You can check how much you have achieved and in what time frame. So if you have been in the gym twice a week for three months (that is 24 times ,and if you did a 1 hour work out that is 24 hours of gym work!!!), that is absolutely amazing! That is awesome, because before you may not have gone at all before, so that is a massive step! Yes, things will get difficult but go back to why you started this in the first place and what you want to achieve and get out of it. If you have followed this then you will know why you are doing what you are doing and you would have recorded it which is your reminder. You have identified and done the self work to know what your drivers are to get what you want; this is really, really important for you.
Get a journal or write a diary, that is what I use, but you must use something that works for you as we are all different. Do you remember my last video where I showed you a book from Kevin Kruse where it was recorded that successful people write or keep journals? (Click here to go to the video) I talked about making sure you schedule time in your day to take an action which leads to your resolution, this ensures you do at least one thing each day that feeds into your resolution; this is what successful people who run million pound companies do, so you can follow their habits that bring success!
Let us think about this for a minute; if you have a whole week (seven days) if you did 1 action every day that’s 7 actions at the end of that week, fourteen actions by the end of week 2, by the end of the month you have 28 actions and you can continue to build slowly! (that is the power of compound interest on your actions) So have a schedule of what you are going to do each day to plan out your action. So say for example you are trying to change your negative mindset. You could say “ I am going to change one negative thought into a positive thought each day” and that is it, you have done your now action that day, but you have started! That is all you need to do, you are starting to change the way you are think. So this could be anything; it could be exercising, you might want to do 1 or 2 press ups before or after breakfast! Whatever it is; it could be a short walk around the block, it does not matter, the most important thing is that you are moving toward who you want to be and what you want to do okay!
I know this video has turned into a long one, but it is really important that I bed in some stuff for you, to really give you some information that can really benefit you.
The last things is SMART. You may have heard of this before; it is a management tool and you can use this in any way you want. A lot of businesses use this but I use this for personal development of people.
So is your resolution -
S = Specific. Is it specific? For example if I am losing weight, you might want to say that I want to lose 2 pounds by the end of the month. The point here is that you know exactly what you want to achieve.
M = Measurable. Is your resolution measurable? How are you going to measure your resolution? How are you going to know when you have achieved it? You can only do this if you are able to measure your resolution. Going back to our positive thoughts; you may say that I will have one positive thought per day and by the end of the week it will be 7! In that case you would need to record it somewhere that you have measured that thought and you have evidenced it. So you know when you have achieved it!
A = Agreed. Do you agree with your resolution? Do you agree that what you have stated is achievable for you? Is this something that you really want to do? If not, it is not going to work. It really has to be embedded into what you want to do. It is important to be honest with yourself and whether you sense any resistance to the resolution. This could be some thought that is resisting the change and this is where your self work really needs to kick in. If it is not agreed then you need to start again to make sure what you choose really works for you!
R = Realistic - Is your resolution realistic for you? Do you think you will be able to achieve it? Now this is why I say choose one or two so not to overwhelm yourself, perhaps just have one so you can really focus on this. (choose something that is realistic for you now, when you have achieved that you will gain momentum to try more ambitious goals which you may currently feel are out of reach; this will happen as your mind set changes with the results that you will be getting)
T = Timebound - When are you aiming to achieve resolution by? Make sure you have a realistic time frame, too long and it may not be Realistic as you may never start if it is too far in the distant future. Too short and it may not be Achievable! So choose a timeframe that is a bit challenging; where it takes you from a really comfortable position, to somewhere where it is a little less uncomfortable. I don’t what you to go right out there, so it is too daunting! For example some of us would be comfortable jumping out of an aeroplane, but a lot of us would not! Take it slowly, be kind to yourself. Say: “I am just going to push myself a little bit; I can really do this!”
Once you take those small steps and step outside that comfort zone, you will start to think “wow, I am getting some results here” you slowly start to stretch that comfort zone. Before you know it, you will be right out there achieving some amazing things. When I started these videos it was not comfortable at all for me, check out those early videos, how uncomfortable do I look!! (my first video felt as if I was jumping out of a plane!)
Be passionate, because you really want to do it and you will do it! You will get the highs and you will get the lows; it is those lows where you want that resilience and that comes from your passion to push you through those times. It is just like the change curve, when you start off, when you hit that low you start to come back up, by the end you are little bit stronger than when you started.
Over time you will be getting stronger and stronger, and this is reason why I am asking you to record stuff, so you can see the evidence for yourself!
Life Balance work sheet - this will help you split your time in terms of the different areas of your life. If you go to my website you will see the downloadable sheet which is totally free. Click here to go straight to that page!
You are watching this video because you want to improve, but your life has to be balanced. Your life is like an investment portfolio, so if one area of your life is not working out, there will be other invested areas that will help you pull through those tough times. You can build these resolutions into your time, so you invest in yourself to give yourself the chance to get what you want.
You also need to find out what you learning preference is, and for that I have another video, called learning preference where I talk about VAK. Check out the video, it is here on my site have a look. You can download the free assessment tool click here. You will then be able to identify what your learning preference is. Whether it is V = Visual, A= Auditory or K= K=Kineasthetic (feeling/doing). I want you to use these tools to benefit you.
You know yourself better than anyone, you are the expert on you! As your coach I am here to encourage you to do this and ask questions which will help you discover the person you want to be!
So moving on; I want you to go beyond 2016 , I don’t want you to think, brilliant fantastic I have done it, I have done 2016. The reason for this is that when you reach a goal you might think well I have done that, so what now? What do I do now? Think about it; if you consider amazing athletes, they have got to the top of their game. Some of them think, well I have done it, I have got the gold medal, so what now? So the important thing is that when you get to that level, or you succeed at a goal, enjoy the moment as you totally deserve it. Once you have done this then you need to think about what the growth is going to be for you now. What are your next steps; so lets say you may be losing weight. You might be doing this for all sorts of reasons. So once you have lost the weight and you have got into that suit or dress, what will be next for you? Where are you going to go from here? Is this going to be a lifestyle change? I have lost the weight now, so how do I keep the weight off? How can I maintain a healthy lifestyle? How do I build on that or build on my passion? You might write blogs or help others; think about how amazing that would be. You have lost weight and then you could help others lose weight using similar ways! Whatever it is, you can start to build a lifestyle, where you say “I really enjoyed that, how do I keep that enjoyment going and what is going to be by next step?” What is it for you that is going to take you to the next level in whatever you chose to do?
There are all these possibilities, so when you hit your target, what is your next development stage in this process? What is the long term? So this is not just for 2016, this is ongoing forever! You may want to be happy, so what are you happy doing?
This is what these videos are about, I want you to have the most amazing life you could possibly have! That is my only intention; I want you to live your passions, love what you do, and if you are not happy how to change it and how to get into something amazing and exciting!
Well I hope that has really helped you, I have given you quite a lot of information and it has been quite a long video, but stick with it. If you need to break it down, do it!
So what I would like to say is that I really appreciate you watching this video today, so if you liked it, give it a massive thumbs up. Don’t forget to subscribe if you are new to my channel; and also comment on my video.
If you want me to talk about other subjects, just tell me either on the comments section or through my website or social media. Let me know how you are getting on. Feel free to Tweet me; you will find this all on my link under the video or on my website. You can also sign up to my newsletter where I send periodic updates. You can also e-mail me, again you will find the symbol on my home page of the website in the top right hand corner!
I really want to engage with you guys and hence I am also doing Periscope broadcasts, I am calling them coffee chats at the moment. This is where you can ask me questions live, and that is what is all about. You may want to ask me about certain information about the videos, or we can just chat generally how things are going! It is like having a chat with a friend over a coffee.
I want to create a really positive space for you, so you can chat about things that work for you, or things that haven’t worked for you, because not everything will work for everybody, of course it doesn’t. If I go into a shop and buy a suit, I may not find a suit off the peg that will fit me perfectly. I may need to try a different suit or have one specially made or whatever; and the beauty is you can tailor that! How you use your mind and how you think is how you create the suit that helps you!
So don’t forget to like, subscribe and comment have an amazing 2016 and I know you are going to be absolutely brilliant. So go out there and go for it. Don’t forget to come back to these videos if you are having a tough time, I have given you all the tools now so you can actually nail this. You can do it; so be brilliant. Like comment and subscribe and I will see you next time; have an amazing 2016.
“BE BRILLIANT”
In this video I will show you how to:
- Find out what drives you.
- Identify your values.
- Deal with negative situations and frame them in a positive way so they help you.
- Record your success markers.
- Develop SMART targets to achieve your goals.
Welcome back again guys and as promised I am going to deliver another great video.
I am really pleased, as I have just started to do live broadcasts on Periscope, you guys have really been involved in this, thank you to Mathew Jesso for your support.
Welcome to our new viewers and my loyal subscribers, I just want to say a massive thank you for subscribing.
I am still doing stuff on Facebook and we are now up to 99 likes which is amazing (by the way I have just checked, as of 1.7.16 that is up to 175!), in a very short space of time. I really want to thank all you guys for getting involved in that.
So why I am doing this video? I am doing it for you guys, I really want to help you achieve your goals. One of the massive things we do every year is make new year resolutions. You say “ I am going to do this or I am going to do that” You make a promise to yourself and you don’t really keep it; ( yes I have done this myself, you are not alone!) Some of you might not break them, but some of you do, generally people do break them. For example, people who go to the gym; for the first three months everyone is at it, but after that it all tails off.
What this is all about is for you to have a resolution that really means a lot to you. What I mean by this is that you could have just one or two that really connect with you. So when you think about your resolution you need take action every day that feeds into your resolution. It is not just a case of promising yourself for example “ I am going to lose weight” we will talk about this later in the video. What this is about is really connecting with your true passion and what you really believe in. I truly believe that everyone has value to add to the world and this is where you come in; because a lot of us think about “ well, what is my passion? What is it that I want to share with the world?” This is what this purpose or your journey is all about!
New Years resolutions are a brilliant way to get started, you have a brand new clean slate and you can start again ensuring that you stick with it.
The first thing to think about is:
What are your values? What drives you and what is your passion? You need to identify what sort of person you think you are? (whoever you think you are you will become) So if you think you are a negative person you will always be negative because you are thinking negative. So this is where you can do the self work to start to change those thoughts; you can start to think you are a positive person. You can do it; you can think of the good things that come out of a negative situation ( this is all about framing it in a way that benefits you and does not hinder or hurt you) The way you frame it is up to you; the choice is absolutely yours. Part of this is identifying yourself what drives you and what your value system is. (Remember in my previous videos I talked about your power of choice!)
Values - What is important to you? What makes you get fired up? What makes you get out of bed and go “Wow I want to smash this today!” What makes you do that? Is it that you want to own a company? Do you want to run a company? Do you want to be a manager? Do you want to be happy? Whatever it is, you can absolutely do it. But you have to identify what is it that works for you; that is really, really important because if it does not connect with you, you are never ever going to keep to that resolution that you made to yourself!
This is a question, when we make a resolution are we giving ourselves permission to break it? Again, if we do this it is because we are not really invested in the resolution ( we don’t believe it for some reason and only you know that reason!) So you really have to be invested in it, you have to believe it and you have really, really got to want to do it! This ties into how you really feel, a lot of this is about being 100% honest with yourself. But at the same time you must be kind to yourself. You can break a resolution and start again, the key here is that you have not started all over again; you would have already taken some steps towards what you want to achieve; you need to recognise those steps that you have already taken. So you pick up from those steps you have taken and continue to build from that point onwards. You never ever go backwards, you just move forward at different rates. You may be moving slower for a time. If you go back and review what you have done, you can review that and think I can do slightly better next time, so that way you are building on those successes. So that is what is really important.
People do things like weight loss, and they say “oh no I have put weight on again” in reality you have actually become an improved version of yourself as you tried to lose the weight; you did lose some weight and yes you did put it on again, but you did lose the weight. This means that you are a better version, because the person you were before you thought about losing the weight had not lost any weight, so you have moved forward; you don’t go backwards. The fact that you have lost weight means you can do it again and persist. This means you are building that strength needed to keep moving forward.
Think about this for a moment; we go to the gym or we go running and we do this so our muscles get stronger and part of this is putting your mind in a mind gym. This is the same as building muscle, we build strength into the way we think by practicing! If you keep working at it, it will work. it is like anything, some of us will get it straight way and will persist. For some of us it takes much more time and we need to keep persisting and trying. Sometimes it needs a lot of effort to apply this everyday, putting your mind in that gym and practicing every day those things you believe in, and what you want to achieve.
So let me give you a few more steps you could use.
You may ask how do I identify what drives me? You know when you do something that makes you feel excited, well that is what it is! They key then is to think, what was it about that (what I just did) that got me excited? Well, this is a great little tool you can use.
1 - Write out 25 things that you love and that you are passionate about.
2 - Whittle the list down from 25, to 5 things that you love and are passionate about.
If you do this, it will give you a really good idea about what you are passionate about or what drives you. So you have 25, you get rid of 20 and you are then left with your top 5! The 5 things you have on your list are the things that are going to drive you to do whatever you want to do. So if you have been truthful with yourself they will be absolutely amazing. It may that you have put “I love being with my family; it may be doing exercise; whatever it is, you would have done the work to identify your key drivers. For me, one of my drivers is helping people, and that helps to drive me to create these videos for you.
So now you have your 5 drivers; you can then start to build your one or two new year resolutions! Just pick one or two and don’t overwhelm yourself, as you want this to be achievable for you. Start small and if you get some great traction then great you can then increase them. It is up to you how you manage this and how you make yourself responsible. Ask yourself a question “What do I think is achievable for me right now?” So you may want only one, so you absolutely nail it which will create momentum for you to achieve other goals you have in mind, Or you can build on the resolution you have and make it better or more challenging so you have a base to work from. You know what I talked about in my previous videos about having a mission statement, or a vision about what you want to be or how you want to be as a person; this can tie into that; absolutely! So if you tie this into your mission or vision then this will be even more powerful!
So once you have done this, what I want you to do is to record, or proof what you are doing or have done. So part of that today could be that “You are watching Joe Noya’s video!” (That is an action you can record right now as you are doing it) So build up a journal or something you can refer to, perhaps you might record a video blog, like this where you can record what you are doing. So when you are feeling in that zone, you may feel a great high as you actually try these techniques, then you may get lows; when, or if you hit thought lows you can go back to your records, to check and see how far you have come since you started to carry out your resolution. (this will give you increased motivation to keep persisting!)
Think about our gym example; if someone has been down the gym for three months and then they say “I cannot be bothered now!” that is the time to look at what you have recorded! You can check how much you have achieved and in what time frame. So if you have been in the gym twice a week for three months (that is 24 times ,and if you did a 1 hour work out that is 24 hours of gym work!!!), that is absolutely amazing! That is awesome, because before you may not have gone at all before, so that is a massive step! Yes, things will get difficult but go back to why you started this in the first place and what you want to achieve and get out of it. If you have followed this then you will know why you are doing what you are doing and you would have recorded it which is your reminder. You have identified and done the self work to know what your drivers are to get what you want; this is really, really important for you.
Get a journal or write a diary, that is what I use, but you must use something that works for you as we are all different. Do you remember my last video where I showed you a book from Kevin Kruse where it was recorded that successful people write or keep journals? (Click here to go to the video) I talked about making sure you schedule time in your day to take an action which leads to your resolution, this ensures you do at least one thing each day that feeds into your resolution; this is what successful people who run million pound companies do, so you can follow their habits that bring success!
Let us think about this for a minute; if you have a whole week (seven days) if you did 1 action every day that’s 7 actions at the end of that week, fourteen actions by the end of week 2, by the end of the month you have 28 actions and you can continue to build slowly! (that is the power of compound interest on your actions) So have a schedule of what you are going to do each day to plan out your action. So say for example you are trying to change your negative mindset. You could say “ I am going to change one negative thought into a positive thought each day” and that is it, you have done your now action that day, but you have started! That is all you need to do, you are starting to change the way you are think. So this could be anything; it could be exercising, you might want to do 1 or 2 press ups before or after breakfast! Whatever it is; it could be a short walk around the block, it does not matter, the most important thing is that you are moving toward who you want to be and what you want to do okay!
I know this video has turned into a long one, but it is really important that I bed in some stuff for you, to really give you some information that can really benefit you.
The last things is SMART. You may have heard of this before; it is a management tool and you can use this in any way you want. A lot of businesses use this but I use this for personal development of people.
So is your resolution -
S = Specific. Is it specific? For example if I am losing weight, you might want to say that I want to lose 2 pounds by the end of the month. The point here is that you know exactly what you want to achieve.
M = Measurable. Is your resolution measurable? How are you going to measure your resolution? How are you going to know when you have achieved it? You can only do this if you are able to measure your resolution. Going back to our positive thoughts; you may say that I will have one positive thought per day and by the end of the week it will be 7! In that case you would need to record it somewhere that you have measured that thought and you have evidenced it. So you know when you have achieved it!
A = Agreed. Do you agree with your resolution? Do you agree that what you have stated is achievable for you? Is this something that you really want to do? If not, it is not going to work. It really has to be embedded into what you want to do. It is important to be honest with yourself and whether you sense any resistance to the resolution. This could be some thought that is resisting the change and this is where your self work really needs to kick in. If it is not agreed then you need to start again to make sure what you choose really works for you!
R = Realistic - Is your resolution realistic for you? Do you think you will be able to achieve it? Now this is why I say choose one or two so not to overwhelm yourself, perhaps just have one so you can really focus on this. (choose something that is realistic for you now, when you have achieved that you will gain momentum to try more ambitious goals which you may currently feel are out of reach; this will happen as your mind set changes with the results that you will be getting)
T = Timebound - When are you aiming to achieve resolution by? Make sure you have a realistic time frame, too long and it may not be Realistic as you may never start if it is too far in the distant future. Too short and it may not be Achievable! So choose a timeframe that is a bit challenging; where it takes you from a really comfortable position, to somewhere where it is a little less uncomfortable. I don’t what you to go right out there, so it is too daunting! For example some of us would be comfortable jumping out of an aeroplane, but a lot of us would not! Take it slowly, be kind to yourself. Say: “I am just going to push myself a little bit; I can really do this!”
Once you take those small steps and step outside that comfort zone, you will start to think “wow, I am getting some results here” you slowly start to stretch that comfort zone. Before you know it, you will be right out there achieving some amazing things. When I started these videos it was not comfortable at all for me, check out those early videos, how uncomfortable do I look!! (my first video felt as if I was jumping out of a plane!)
Be passionate, because you really want to do it and you will do it! You will get the highs and you will get the lows; it is those lows where you want that resilience and that comes from your passion to push you through those times. It is just like the change curve, when you start off, when you hit that low you start to come back up, by the end you are little bit stronger than when you started.
Over time you will be getting stronger and stronger, and this is reason why I am asking you to record stuff, so you can see the evidence for yourself!
Life Balance work sheet - this will help you split your time in terms of the different areas of your life. If you go to my website you will see the downloadable sheet which is totally free. Click here to go straight to that page!
You are watching this video because you want to improve, but your life has to be balanced. Your life is like an investment portfolio, so if one area of your life is not working out, there will be other invested areas that will help you pull through those tough times. You can build these resolutions into your time, so you invest in yourself to give yourself the chance to get what you want.
You also need to find out what you learning preference is, and for that I have another video, called learning preference where I talk about VAK. Check out the video, it is here on my site have a look. You can download the free assessment tool click here. You will then be able to identify what your learning preference is. Whether it is V = Visual, A= Auditory or K= K=Kineasthetic (feeling/doing). I want you to use these tools to benefit you.
You know yourself better than anyone, you are the expert on you! As your coach I am here to encourage you to do this and ask questions which will help you discover the person you want to be!
So moving on; I want you to go beyond 2016 , I don’t want you to think, brilliant fantastic I have done it, I have done 2016. The reason for this is that when you reach a goal you might think well I have done that, so what now? What do I do now? Think about it; if you consider amazing athletes, they have got to the top of their game. Some of them think, well I have done it, I have got the gold medal, so what now? So the important thing is that when you get to that level, or you succeed at a goal, enjoy the moment as you totally deserve it. Once you have done this then you need to think about what the growth is going to be for you now. What are your next steps; so lets say you may be losing weight. You might be doing this for all sorts of reasons. So once you have lost the weight and you have got into that suit or dress, what will be next for you? Where are you going to go from here? Is this going to be a lifestyle change? I have lost the weight now, so how do I keep the weight off? How can I maintain a healthy lifestyle? How do I build on that or build on my passion? You might write blogs or help others; think about how amazing that would be. You have lost weight and then you could help others lose weight using similar ways! Whatever it is, you can start to build a lifestyle, where you say “I really enjoyed that, how do I keep that enjoyment going and what is going to be by next step?” What is it for you that is going to take you to the next level in whatever you chose to do?
There are all these possibilities, so when you hit your target, what is your next development stage in this process? What is the long term? So this is not just for 2016, this is ongoing forever! You may want to be happy, so what are you happy doing?
This is what these videos are about, I want you to have the most amazing life you could possibly have! That is my only intention; I want you to live your passions, love what you do, and if you are not happy how to change it and how to get into something amazing and exciting!
Well I hope that has really helped you, I have given you quite a lot of information and it has been quite a long video, but stick with it. If you need to break it down, do it!
So what I would like to say is that I really appreciate you watching this video today, so if you liked it, give it a massive thumbs up. Don’t forget to subscribe if you are new to my channel; and also comment on my video.
If you want me to talk about other subjects, just tell me either on the comments section or through my website or social media. Let me know how you are getting on. Feel free to Tweet me; you will find this all on my link under the video or on my website. You can also sign up to my newsletter where I send periodic updates. You can also e-mail me, again you will find the symbol on my home page of the website in the top right hand corner!
I really want to engage with you guys and hence I am also doing Periscope broadcasts, I am calling them coffee chats at the moment. This is where you can ask me questions live, and that is what is all about. You may want to ask me about certain information about the videos, or we can just chat generally how things are going! It is like having a chat with a friend over a coffee.
I want to create a really positive space for you, so you can chat about things that work for you, or things that haven’t worked for you, because not everything will work for everybody, of course it doesn’t. If I go into a shop and buy a suit, I may not find a suit off the peg that will fit me perfectly. I may need to try a different suit or have one specially made or whatever; and the beauty is you can tailor that! How you use your mind and how you think is how you create the suit that helps you!
So don’t forget to like, subscribe and comment have an amazing 2016 and I know you are going to be absolutely brilliant. So go out there and go for it. Don’t forget to come back to these videos if you are having a tough time, I have given you all the tools now so you can actually nail this. You can do it; so be brilliant. Like comment and subscribe and I will see you next time; have an amazing 2016.
“BE BRILLIANT”
How to get motivated to get what you want
This is my motivational Christmas message, have a fantastic Christmas. Feel free to engage and message me to let me know how you all get on. Be brilliant!
In this video I talk about.
Knowing yourself is really important
People around you can have an influence over what you do
Understanding why bad habits can sometimes be hard to change
What drives you and using your passion to get things done
Acknowledging where you are now
The power of choice
Breaking down larger goals into smaller more manageable chunks
Being kind to yourself
Recording your journey
Really appreciate you guys watching and interacting so don’t forget to like, subscribe and comment and let me know how you all get on. Be Brilliant!
This is my motivational Christmas message, have a fantastic Christmas. Feel free to engage and message me to let me know how you all get on. Be brilliant!
In this video I talk about.
- Knowing yourself.
- People around you can have an influence over what you do.
- Understanding why bad habits can sometimes be hard to change.
- What drives you and using your passion to get things done.
- Acknowledging where you are now.
- The power of choice.
- Breaking down large goals into smaller more manageable chunks.
- Being kind to yourself.
- Recording your journey
Knowing yourself is really important
- You need to think about - What is holding you back? Identifying what is holding you back and really tuning into that to make a plan to move yourself forward. Brainstorming ideas and see what you come up with to really start to make those changes that will benefit YOU.
People around you can have an influence over what you do
- You need to think about - The people around you and whether they are assisting you in achieving what you want to achieve.
Understanding why bad habits can sometimes be hard to change
- You need to think about - How to change out of your old bad habit groove by lifting the needle and placing it where you want the new habits to start and to keep practicing the new habits. Remember you have been practicing those bad habits for a long time and that is why sometimes they are hard to change.
What drives you and using your passion to get things done
- You need to think about - What do you love to do? Connect with your passion and use that passion to drive the plan. Take 30 minutes writing out where you want to be and what you want to do by using your passion to drive that change.
Acknowledging where you are now
- You need to think about - What is your current situation? Write it out in detail and then start thinking about how you could start to change that situation.
The power of choice
- Your need to think about - You CHOOSE to do what you are doing now, so if you don’t like what you are doing you have the power to change CHOOSE to do something else!
Breaking down larger goals into smaller more manageable chunks
- You need to think about - How you can brake down the goal into a smaller size, so you can take smaller actions to bring about the change, just take small actions each and every day which move you toward your larger goal. Enjoy the journey!
Being kind to yourself
- You need to think about - When taking actions and things do not go as planned congratulate yourself that you were brave enough to take that action, and then start and build further actions; whether that action produces the result that you don’t or do want make sure you give yourself credit! You are doing things that most other people do not do, you are putting yourself in that 1% category of amazing people!
Recording your journey
- You need to think about - How you will record your results so you can see the journey, this could be by writing it down or even a video diary. This is important as it will show you how far you have come since you started and you will be surprised! This can be very useful when you come across challenging times.
Really appreciate you guys watching and interacting so don’t forget to like, subscribe and comment and let me know how you all get on. Be Brilliant!
How to coach yourself out of a moaning mindset and into an action mindset!
Video transcript with a few extras!
How to get out of a moaning habit!!
Hi I am Joe Noya your peak performance coach and welcome back again. Today I am going to say to you how you can coach yourself out of a moaning club!
So when we are looking at moaning clubs what are we talking about? It will be at place at work or in the home, anywhere really, but your will recognise the place as this is where you would usually moan! Moaning can be a good thing in terms of getting things off your chest and venting things, but when you get things off your chest, you then need to start doing something about it.
Persistent moaning will lead you to de-motivation, and if you are de-motivated you are not going to get to where you want to be. So it is very important that you recognise when you are in a moaning club and it is actually affecting you.
Part 1 - First things first:
What do you do about it? The first thing you have got to do is to identify that you are in a moaning club! To identify you are in a moaning club you will usually get together with a group of people to get things off your chest. You will moan about certain things and you will get people agreeing with you; subconsciously when people agree with you when you are moaning it is reinforcing that negative behaviour (avoid reinforcing negative behaviour). There is difference between getting things off your chest and moaning. Getting things off your chest is natural, I do it we all do it as we are all human beings and we sometimes just need to get it off our chest and into the open because we feel upset. This helps get rid of the emotion. So it is important you know the difference between venting and moaning. Venting is releasing that emotion, however moaning is repetitive and goes over the same ground so you go into a cycle.
Moan, then you go back and then moan again, with the same people who are agreeing and sympathising with you which reinforces that behaviour and traps you in the cycle without you being aware of it!
So it is moan - moan again, the moan is reinforced with sympathy, which then encourages the behaviour and you moan again, until you find something else to moan about and follow the same cycle. In this club you will all be doing it and all reinforcing each others behaviour They will say “yes agree with you, I totally get that or understand that” etc This then feeds into your subconscious and it becomes your moaning cycle and you just don't ever do anything about what you are moaning about.
Cycle is Moan - Reinforce - Moan.
This video is to train you to be aware when you are in that situation, in this case the moaning club, and how you can get out of it to achieve what you want!
Part 2 - How to coach your way out!
1 - The first this to ask yourself is what are you moaning about? What is the issue? Are you moaning about others at work, whatever it is you need to identify it. The best thing to do is to write it down, so you can visualise and actually see what you are moaning about.
2 - What about that moan is holding you back? What is making you go back to that same old club and keeping you trapped in the moaning cycle; what is frustrating you? It might be that the boss is really annoying you, or someone else is annoying at work so again write this out It could be because someone is annoying you and you are losing focus on your career, or it is stopping you from performing because you are channelling so much energy into the moan that you do not have time or energy for anything else!
IMPORTANT - You must write this, out if you don't write to out it is not going to work because you need to visually l see where you are with the issue. It also helps your mind focus on the issue and your brain will help you figure what is actually going on and help you change your behaviour.
3 - What could I start to do about it?
If it your boss at work, what could you start to do to start moving forward? By asking this question you will start to come up with your own answers as your mind will start to try and problem solve! The issue will be unique to you, and your mind will start to work on that issue to start giving you answers. For example with the boss scenario, you may come up with, that you should have a conversation with them in a constructive manner to try and resolve whatever issue you are having issues with. So what is it? But YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Otherwise what is going to happen? You are going to keep moaning, you going to stay in the cycle and keep going down, down and down the spiral until you have no energy to do anything.
So just take small steps at first something that is a little uncomfortable, but you feel you are able to do it. Perhaps in relation to the above scenario you may be more comfortable inviting your boss out for coffee rather than deal with it in the office, as the environment is more neutral, but it must be your action nobody elses. If you have that conversation make sure you both get something out of it too, so both of you can save face, so you both win!
4- Identify the people that are going to help you!
When you have the moan and you say, so what are we going to do about it? It may be only one other person that agrees that something needs to be done, because unfortunately most people will want to just keep moaning! They are just not aware that it is affecting them! As you are watching this video I am assuming you do want to do something about it, and that makes you rare and someone that wants to achieve something!
So you may identify others you may not, whatever the case you need to start to write down potential solutions, this is called brain storming! You can then select the best solution to make a plan! So now you have some potential solutions, select the best ones then go to the next step.
5 - So when are you going to carry out the action?
Set a date, in this case when you are going to speak to your boss and carry out the action you decided on? Make the date a date that you will carry out, if it is too demanding you will not carry it out, likewise if the date is far into the future it is unlikely you will ever do it too. So make sure it is something you will definitely do; one week is usually a good time frame. Again you must be committed, ask yourself, on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the most likely and 1 not at all, how likely am I to carry out this action. If it is a 1, then forget it, you need to reconsider, you need to be aiming for a 9 or 10! This will ensure you carry out the action!
By taking this action you get a new cycle! You turn the moaning club into an ACTION CLUB!
The new cycle is that you MOAN about something, WHAT COULD I DO ABOIUT IT? Then put an ACTION in place whatever you feel comfortable with, put in five actions if that is what you would be happy with, or one action as long as it will help you move forward. As long as you do it and smash it; then you get RESULTS! So when you get the results you can then review them, sometimes they are not the results you wanted, but you are moving forward so you can then review and create new actions that will provide different results! I guarantee that if you continue to do this you will get the results you want and they will be amazing. You will find that you are no longer moaning about that issue, this provides you with energy to do the things you want which is great!
You will think great, I am now taking action and this will start to build your motivation and confidence , you will get out of the de-motivation stage and get into a motivated stage. You will be really active about what you are doing instead of just thinking “well I cant do anything about it”. Whatever situation you are in you can DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT IF YOU CHOOSE TOO
This is my challenge to you, let us just see how we get on, so remember the above cycle; the more results you get and the more chance they will be good results which will give you more motivation. This gives you more choice and more power over the issues which are holding you back. You will always get set backs, of course you will, we are in the real world here, you will always get stuff that doesn't work, but my challenge to you is yo work at it and see how you get on.
So thanks for watching my video, go to my website (well you are already here so thanks for that!) there are loads of free coaching tools here just go to the menu at the side of the page; join me on facebook click here, like the page, join me on Instagram & Twitter (for Twitter click here) under jncoachingtech, also Linkedin.
Also go to the about page on my website and sign up to my newsletter click here, get news and things before anyone else, I will also send out a few surveys so get involved in that. You can also ping me an e-mail [email protected]. Let me know what sort of things you would like me to cover that is fine too.
Make sure that you continue to be BRILLIANT, continue to work on those things we talked about.
Don’t forget to LIKE the video on my YouTube channel, also hit that SUBSCRIBE button click here, that is really important so then you will get a notification when I do my next video. Please also leave some comments; I had a great comment from Ben on my last video which was about “How to impress at a job interview” check it out of you have not done so already. So feel free to comment and I will respond to you. So I will see you next time and continue to be BRILLIANT; GO FOR IT!
Hi I am Joe Noya your peak performance coach and welcome back again. Today I am going to say to you how you can coach yourself out of a moaning club!
So when we are looking at moaning clubs what are we talking about? It will be at place at work or in the home, anywhere really, but your will recognise the place as this is where you would usually moan! Moaning can be a good thing in terms of getting things off your chest and venting things, but when you get things off your chest, you then need to start doing something about it.
Persistent moaning will lead you to de-motivation, and if you are de-motivated you are not going to get to where you want to be. So it is very important that you recognise when you are in a moaning club and it is actually affecting you.
Part 1 - First things first:
What do you do about it? The first thing you have got to do is to identify that you are in a moaning club! To identify you are in a moaning club you will usually get together with a group of people to get things off your chest. You will moan about certain things and you will get people agreeing with you; subconsciously when people agree with you when you are moaning it is reinforcing that negative behaviour (avoid reinforcing negative behaviour). There is difference between getting things off your chest and moaning. Getting things off your chest is natural, I do it we all do it as we are all human beings and we sometimes just need to get it off our chest and into the open because we feel upset. This helps get rid of the emotion. So it is important you know the difference between venting and moaning. Venting is releasing that emotion, however moaning is repetitive and goes over the same ground so you go into a cycle.
Moan, then you go back and then moan again, with the same people who are agreeing and sympathising with you which reinforces that behaviour and traps you in the cycle without you being aware of it!
So it is moan - moan again, the moan is reinforced with sympathy, which then encourages the behaviour and you moan again, until you find something else to moan about and follow the same cycle. In this club you will all be doing it and all reinforcing each others behaviour They will say “yes agree with you, I totally get that or understand that” etc This then feeds into your subconscious and it becomes your moaning cycle and you just don't ever do anything about what you are moaning about.
Cycle is Moan - Reinforce - Moan.
This video is to train you to be aware when you are in that situation, in this case the moaning club, and how you can get out of it to achieve what you want!
Part 2 - How to coach your way out!
1 - The first this to ask yourself is what are you moaning about? What is the issue? Are you moaning about others at work, whatever it is you need to identify it. The best thing to do is to write it down, so you can visualise and actually see what you are moaning about.
2 - What about that moan is holding you back? What is making you go back to that same old club and keeping you trapped in the moaning cycle; what is frustrating you? It might be that the boss is really annoying you, or someone else is annoying at work so again write this out It could be because someone is annoying you and you are losing focus on your career, or it is stopping you from performing because you are channelling so much energy into the moan that you do not have time or energy for anything else!
IMPORTANT - You must write this, out if you don't write to out it is not going to work because you need to visually l see where you are with the issue. It also helps your mind focus on the issue and your brain will help you figure what is actually going on and help you change your behaviour.
3 - What could I start to do about it?
If it your boss at work, what could you start to do to start moving forward? By asking this question you will start to come up with your own answers as your mind will start to try and problem solve! The issue will be unique to you, and your mind will start to work on that issue to start giving you answers. For example with the boss scenario, you may come up with, that you should have a conversation with them in a constructive manner to try and resolve whatever issue you are having issues with. So what is it? But YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Otherwise what is going to happen? You are going to keep moaning, you going to stay in the cycle and keep going down, down and down the spiral until you have no energy to do anything.
So just take small steps at first something that is a little uncomfortable, but you feel you are able to do it. Perhaps in relation to the above scenario you may be more comfortable inviting your boss out for coffee rather than deal with it in the office, as the environment is more neutral, but it must be your action nobody elses. If you have that conversation make sure you both get something out of it too, so both of you can save face, so you both win!
4- Identify the people that are going to help you!
When you have the moan and you say, so what are we going to do about it? It may be only one other person that agrees that something needs to be done, because unfortunately most people will want to just keep moaning! They are just not aware that it is affecting them! As you are watching this video I am assuming you do want to do something about it, and that makes you rare and someone that wants to achieve something!
So you may identify others you may not, whatever the case you need to start to write down potential solutions, this is called brain storming! You can then select the best solution to make a plan! So now you have some potential solutions, select the best ones then go to the next step.
5 - So when are you going to carry out the action?
Set a date, in this case when you are going to speak to your boss and carry out the action you decided on? Make the date a date that you will carry out, if it is too demanding you will not carry it out, likewise if the date is far into the future it is unlikely you will ever do it too. So make sure it is something you will definitely do; one week is usually a good time frame. Again you must be committed, ask yourself, on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the most likely and 1 not at all, how likely am I to carry out this action. If it is a 1, then forget it, you need to reconsider, you need to be aiming for a 9 or 10! This will ensure you carry out the action!
By taking this action you get a new cycle! You turn the moaning club into an ACTION CLUB!
The new cycle is that you MOAN about something, WHAT COULD I DO ABOIUT IT? Then put an ACTION in place whatever you feel comfortable with, put in five actions if that is what you would be happy with, or one action as long as it will help you move forward. As long as you do it and smash it; then you get RESULTS! So when you get the results you can then review them, sometimes they are not the results you wanted, but you are moving forward so you can then review and create new actions that will provide different results! I guarantee that if you continue to do this you will get the results you want and they will be amazing. You will find that you are no longer moaning about that issue, this provides you with energy to do the things you want which is great!
You will think great, I am now taking action and this will start to build your motivation and confidence , you will get out of the de-motivation stage and get into a motivated stage. You will be really active about what you are doing instead of just thinking “well I cant do anything about it”. Whatever situation you are in you can DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT IF YOU CHOOSE TOO
This is my challenge to you, let us just see how we get on, so remember the above cycle; the more results you get and the more chance they will be good results which will give you more motivation. This gives you more choice and more power over the issues which are holding you back. You will always get set backs, of course you will, we are in the real world here, you will always get stuff that doesn't work, but my challenge to you is yo work at it and see how you get on.
So thanks for watching my video, go to my website (well you are already here so thanks for that!) there are loads of free coaching tools here just go to the menu at the side of the page; join me on facebook click here, like the page, join me on Instagram & Twitter (for Twitter click here) under jncoachingtech, also Linkedin.
Also go to the about page on my website and sign up to my newsletter click here, get news and things before anyone else, I will also send out a few surveys so get involved in that. You can also ping me an e-mail [email protected]. Let me know what sort of things you would like me to cover that is fine too.
Make sure that you continue to be BRILLIANT, continue to work on those things we talked about.
Don’t forget to LIKE the video on my YouTube channel, also hit that SUBSCRIBE button click here, that is really important so then you will get a notification when I do my next video. Please also leave some comments; I had a great comment from Ben on my last video which was about “How to impress at a job interview” check it out of you have not done so already. So feel free to comment and I will respond to you. So I will see you next time and continue to be BRILLIANT; GO FOR IT!
How to become more confident!
Transcript of how to be more confident. What! With even more extras; of course just for you guys as I want you to succeed!!!
How to become more confident in all you do!
Hi guys and welcome back again, and thanks for watching all my other videos. I am going to be talking about how to be confident more easily. This came about because a lot of you have signed up to my newsletter(so thank you for that! Big thumbs up) and I did a little survey which I send out from time to time. Just so I can see what you like and what you don't like and the sort of material you would like to see me talk about. So today is this one on “ How to be more confident easily”
All the surveys are anonymous so whoever has asked me to talk about this subject I thank you for that as it is a great subject to cover in terms of coaching. So this is for you so I hope you get a massive load of information from this that will help you. Also feel free to go and watch my other videos.
Unconfidence!
This comes from what you believe and how you think about yourself. So when you think about yourself and how you perceive yourself, this is what I call your identity; in other words this is your story. Confidence is really about what you tell yourself, so whatever your story is, it may be that your unconfident about speaking in front of people or you feel unconfident about going out and seeing people. When you are asked to do something you are not confident about, what are you thinking about at that moment? It may be that your are saying to yourself “ I cant do it” or you are thinking that definitely will not be done. So when you are are unconfident in a particular situation, the cause is most likely that you are telling yourself you cannot do something or you just feel unconfident about doing whatever it is. The reason for this is that you are living your unconfident story or making decisions based on your identity which at this stage is not confident!
The important thing here is that you do possess a secret super power called, wait for it………, the POWER OF CHOICE! You can actually chose to either not to be confident or to be confident! Think about that for a moment, when you are not confident you are having thoughts about not being confident in a particular situation, so until you saw my video or are reading this transcript this was not brought to your conscious awareness; not that it has you can do something about it. So now this is about creating a new story or identity that is you being the confident person that you want to be.
Exercise
So what I would like you to do to start the process is to write out what is making you unconfident. So this will be specific to you, the important thing here is to be honest with yourself! You do need to do this so that you can visually see what is making you unconfident. So then you can really think about and analyse what is making you feel this way. By seeing the issue you can then start to do something about it and if your intention is there then you brain will start to think of ways to change this story for you.
POWER OF CHOICE RE-VISTED
So going back to the power of choice the reason your are unconfident is because you keep telling yourself that you are; the story that you have written out you will keep telling yourself and therefore what are the chances that you are going to be confident? Most likely zero! So the more you tell yourself this story you brain will believe, it the result is you will stay being unconfident! So the trick here is to use that to your advantage and use the same process but in a positive way that benefits you and in this case it is to change your story to a confident one. In this way once you start to live this confident story you will start to make choices and decisions from this more empowering place.
Through this power of choice that I have been talking about you are going to decide to (because you are watching this video I am assuming that you do want to change to become more confident) be more confident. I absolutely believe you can do this and it will make a massive improvement, but you have got to make sure that you do it. As I have said in my other videos you can know what you have to do, but you must actually do it. There is a massive difference between knowing and doing! So please sit down and physically write out this confident story so that you can start to be more confident.
Creating your new story/identity
So it may be that you just want to write “I am going to be more confident in …..subject/situation….” it can be as simple as this, but try and make it exciting so it fires you up. Even at this stage if you do not believe it, make the story so empowering and exciting that when you read it you will feel much more empowered. It should be something that really connects with your inner core and it is something you truly want to achieve. So you might be thinking “ I am absolutely going to smash this, I am not going to let this beat me because I want to meet new people etc” whatever it is, use the outcome of whatever you want to achieve as the driver to make that confident story happen. You might want a new relationship, you might want to improve your career prospects etc . So use the purpose of why you want to be more confident to motivate you to living your new story. If some of things you want to do are a little too much, for example if you are worried about going to the social function, perhaps go for 30 mins instead of a full evening, at least then you would have started the process of living your new story. This will provide evidence to your subconscious and gradually the change should start to happen.
A good question to ask yourself to build on your story is to think about how you could start to become more confident? Brainstorm some ideas, it may be that you just need to go outside and catch up with some friends or phone someone, whatever it is just do it, so you can start to build that confidence and it can feed into your new story.
So going back to that story you might want to write it out, but I recognise that writing may not be your strong point. If that is the case then try others things such as drawing a picture of what confidence looks like to you! It might be an exciting picture of you presenting at a conference, you might draw yourself in a new relationship or drawing yourself into an amazing job. Whatever it is make it something exciting so you have it there. I would also suggest that you put it somewhere so that when you wake up in the morning you can look at it. This will remind you of your story so you can practice your story everyday. That is the most important thing here repetitive action, just like when you kept telling yourself you were unconfident you going to use this strength to your own advantage and use the same process to make yourself confident! This will start to change the messages to your subconscious, then this will feed into your consciousness to give you that energy to be more confident. So make sure you carry it out.
So you have your old story so what are we going to do with it! What I tend to do with the people I coach is to take them through an exercise to DESTROY YOUR UNCONFIDENCE! So now is the time to have some fun with it. Watch the video and watch me rip up unconfidence and also try and punch it and miss!! But watch I don't let it get away, sometimes you just have to persist and make sure you do DESTROY IT! So have some fun here, whether you want to punch the hell out of unconfidence whatever it is do something physical so it puts you in a state of DETERMINATION!! to really go for it. So use your body language, shoulders back, act is if you are confident when you destroy your old story! When you do it, say it out loud that you are going to destroy this old you and create the new you who is amazingly confident. Do it so you really mean it!
Failure!!!
Sometimes we do not do things because we are afraid to fail or we think something might happen. For example you might go to that party or gathering and you think you might get rejected. Again think about that for a moment; what does failure mean to you? This can be a big thing because you don't want to do a lot of things because you feel you might fail! One of the phrases I like to use when I coach is “ Show me someone who has not failed and I will show you someone who has done nothing” I really like this one, because if you don't try anything, then you not ever going to do or accomplish anything! So you have got to try and do something even if you fail!
So let us look at failure what does this mean? Failure; you can change what this means to you (again by using the power of choice) instead of thinking” I am terrible” or you may hear a voice saying “you have failed, you are terrible, you are not doing it right” What I am saying here is that you need to tell that voice “ Well I am doing …..whatever it is…..” be assertive with that negative voice. In this way you are keeping that negative voice under control. You can do it!
Here is an example of failure and how it can help you. Think about new born babies. So let us think about this, as soon as they are born do they come out and start walking straight away? No, they don’t, they cannot even crawl, they first have strengthen their arms to push up and get their neck strength , etc. Before they crawl or walk think about how many times the baby would have fallen down. But instead of giving up how do they use that failure or set back? They use it as a learning experience learn from it and go again! A baby does not know failure, so as we grow we tend to learn how to fail and get discouraged which starts that reinforcement of failure. We forget to use that power of to persistence when we were babies to get the results we want!!! Think how unafraid babies are! ( I have also seen young children go on scary park rides and I think well if they are getting on why can’t I) We can learn so much from this, so next time you see a new born think about that for the moment! So failure is really feedback so we can continue to improve ourselves. So by failing at things we can learn from that experience to become even better, so this is what it is all about. Think about something you are good at, were you really good at it straight away? Probably not, or even if you were good you still improved because you may have failed or not performed so well. But because you loved whatever it is so much you persisted and became much better because you chose to!
As we have said before life is like this, life does not always work out, when it doesn't what can you learn from that to make yourself better! Use failure to your advantage, so what went wrong and how can I now improve whatever it was? So this is how you can improve your confidence, so now you won’t fail because you use your failure as a learning curve to make your life and confidence even better! Failure is now on your side!
Let us recap
1) Write out your unconfident story.
2) Write out or picture your confident story. Remember “THE POWER OF CHOICE”
Destroy your unconfidence. get that picture whatever it is, rip it up or do whatever is necessary to get rid of that unconfidence using all your body so that message hits home.
3) Reinforce your new found confidence - Having that new story by your bed so you can read it each morning and everyday you are practicing it. Do something that you love to do and that you are good at so it starts to build that confident feeling/evidence. Then you can start to stretch yourself into areas which you may not have gone into before. Maybe slowly at first, but gradually, gradually you take those steps and take a bit more risk. So if you do this and you have done really well give yourself a pat on the back. If it has not worked out still give yourself a pat on the back, because you are the one who went out and did that. You actually did it, no one else was doing, I am not doing it, you are DOING IT! You are watching this video because you want to do it. I know that you can absolutely do this and I have total belief in you!
4) Failure - Remember the meaning - We never fail we learn from what we do, if it does not work out we can just do something else, we can try an alternative and make ourselves even better. Failure is now on your side!
Moving forward
One more thing I wanted to add to this is TO BE KIND TO YOURSELF. So if you get that pointy finger or negative voice saying “you are bad” etc. Remember you are a GOOD PERSON and you deserve to be treated well. If you were talking to your best friend would you treat them the same way you treat yourself by saying things like “ you are rubbish” etc. You would be there for them and encourage them and this is how you need to treat yourself! If you are thinking negative thoughts, give yourself a chance and be kind to yourself if things do not work out, at least you tried and you can just try again. Also watch your language and how you describe yourself make sure you keep saying that “you are going for it “ “ I am going to try and do these things”. If you catch yourself saying things like “ I cant do this” etc just try and change your language into a more positive phrase so you give yourself a chance of succeeding. Remember you will believe whatever you keep telling yourself!
This stuff may not happen over night for some of you it will happen with the click of a finger, for most of you it will be a slower process. But if you work at it I promise it will give you results and that is what I want for you guys, I want you guys to succeed.
So thanks for watching and I hope this has really helped, so don't forget to like this video, and do not forget to subscribe so you get a notification when my next video has been uploaded. If you are watching on my website go to my You Tube channel click here, so you can subscribe.
Let us continue to work together and I will keep uploading stuff that you can use; feel free to comment on the videos, catch up with me on Facebook and Twitter etc, the links can be found on my home page on the top right hand corner. Click here to go straight to the home page.
Continue to be BRILLIANT, I know you can do it, don't forget I am always here by coming back to the video. So get out there and be CONFIDENT. Share your amazing stories with me and let me know how you get on.
Thanks all for watching you are all AMAZING!!!
Hi guys and welcome back again, and thanks for watching all my other videos. I am going to be talking about how to be confident more easily. This came about because a lot of you have signed up to my newsletter(so thank you for that! Big thumbs up) and I did a little survey which I send out from time to time. Just so I can see what you like and what you don't like and the sort of material you would like to see me talk about. So today is this one on “ How to be more confident easily”
All the surveys are anonymous so whoever has asked me to talk about this subject I thank you for that as it is a great subject to cover in terms of coaching. So this is for you so I hope you get a massive load of information from this that will help you. Also feel free to go and watch my other videos.
Unconfidence!
This comes from what you believe and how you think about yourself. So when you think about yourself and how you perceive yourself, this is what I call your identity; in other words this is your story. Confidence is really about what you tell yourself, so whatever your story is, it may be that your unconfident about speaking in front of people or you feel unconfident about going out and seeing people. When you are asked to do something you are not confident about, what are you thinking about at that moment? It may be that your are saying to yourself “ I cant do it” or you are thinking that definitely will not be done. So when you are are unconfident in a particular situation, the cause is most likely that you are telling yourself you cannot do something or you just feel unconfident about doing whatever it is. The reason for this is that you are living your unconfident story or making decisions based on your identity which at this stage is not confident!
The important thing here is that you do possess a secret super power called, wait for it………, the POWER OF CHOICE! You can actually chose to either not to be confident or to be confident! Think about that for a moment, when you are not confident you are having thoughts about not being confident in a particular situation, so until you saw my video or are reading this transcript this was not brought to your conscious awareness; not that it has you can do something about it. So now this is about creating a new story or identity that is you being the confident person that you want to be.
Exercise
So what I would like you to do to start the process is to write out what is making you unconfident. So this will be specific to you, the important thing here is to be honest with yourself! You do need to do this so that you can visually see what is making you unconfident. So then you can really think about and analyse what is making you feel this way. By seeing the issue you can then start to do something about it and if your intention is there then you brain will start to think of ways to change this story for you.
POWER OF CHOICE RE-VISTED
So going back to the power of choice the reason your are unconfident is because you keep telling yourself that you are; the story that you have written out you will keep telling yourself and therefore what are the chances that you are going to be confident? Most likely zero! So the more you tell yourself this story you brain will believe, it the result is you will stay being unconfident! So the trick here is to use that to your advantage and use the same process but in a positive way that benefits you and in this case it is to change your story to a confident one. In this way once you start to live this confident story you will start to make choices and decisions from this more empowering place.
Through this power of choice that I have been talking about you are going to decide to (because you are watching this video I am assuming that you do want to change to become more confident) be more confident. I absolutely believe you can do this and it will make a massive improvement, but you have got to make sure that you do it. As I have said in my other videos you can know what you have to do, but you must actually do it. There is a massive difference between knowing and doing! So please sit down and physically write out this confident story so that you can start to be more confident.
Creating your new story/identity
So it may be that you just want to write “I am going to be more confident in …..subject/situation….” it can be as simple as this, but try and make it exciting so it fires you up. Even at this stage if you do not believe it, make the story so empowering and exciting that when you read it you will feel much more empowered. It should be something that really connects with your inner core and it is something you truly want to achieve. So you might be thinking “ I am absolutely going to smash this, I am not going to let this beat me because I want to meet new people etc” whatever it is, use the outcome of whatever you want to achieve as the driver to make that confident story happen. You might want a new relationship, you might want to improve your career prospects etc . So use the purpose of why you want to be more confident to motivate you to living your new story. If some of things you want to do are a little too much, for example if you are worried about going to the social function, perhaps go for 30 mins instead of a full evening, at least then you would have started the process of living your new story. This will provide evidence to your subconscious and gradually the change should start to happen.
A good question to ask yourself to build on your story is to think about how you could start to become more confident? Brainstorm some ideas, it may be that you just need to go outside and catch up with some friends or phone someone, whatever it is just do it, so you can start to build that confidence and it can feed into your new story.
So going back to that story you might want to write it out, but I recognise that writing may not be your strong point. If that is the case then try others things such as drawing a picture of what confidence looks like to you! It might be an exciting picture of you presenting at a conference, you might draw yourself in a new relationship or drawing yourself into an amazing job. Whatever it is make it something exciting so you have it there. I would also suggest that you put it somewhere so that when you wake up in the morning you can look at it. This will remind you of your story so you can practice your story everyday. That is the most important thing here repetitive action, just like when you kept telling yourself you were unconfident you going to use this strength to your own advantage and use the same process to make yourself confident! This will start to change the messages to your subconscious, then this will feed into your consciousness to give you that energy to be more confident. So make sure you carry it out.
So you have your old story so what are we going to do with it! What I tend to do with the people I coach is to take them through an exercise to DESTROY YOUR UNCONFIDENCE! So now is the time to have some fun with it. Watch the video and watch me rip up unconfidence and also try and punch it and miss!! But watch I don't let it get away, sometimes you just have to persist and make sure you do DESTROY IT! So have some fun here, whether you want to punch the hell out of unconfidence whatever it is do something physical so it puts you in a state of DETERMINATION!! to really go for it. So use your body language, shoulders back, act is if you are confident when you destroy your old story! When you do it, say it out loud that you are going to destroy this old you and create the new you who is amazingly confident. Do it so you really mean it!
Failure!!!
Sometimes we do not do things because we are afraid to fail or we think something might happen. For example you might go to that party or gathering and you think you might get rejected. Again think about that for a moment; what does failure mean to you? This can be a big thing because you don't want to do a lot of things because you feel you might fail! One of the phrases I like to use when I coach is “ Show me someone who has not failed and I will show you someone who has done nothing” I really like this one, because if you don't try anything, then you not ever going to do or accomplish anything! So you have got to try and do something even if you fail!
So let us look at failure what does this mean? Failure; you can change what this means to you (again by using the power of choice) instead of thinking” I am terrible” or you may hear a voice saying “you have failed, you are terrible, you are not doing it right” What I am saying here is that you need to tell that voice “ Well I am doing …..whatever it is…..” be assertive with that negative voice. In this way you are keeping that negative voice under control. You can do it!
Here is an example of failure and how it can help you. Think about new born babies. So let us think about this, as soon as they are born do they come out and start walking straight away? No, they don’t, they cannot even crawl, they first have strengthen their arms to push up and get their neck strength , etc. Before they crawl or walk think about how many times the baby would have fallen down. But instead of giving up how do they use that failure or set back? They use it as a learning experience learn from it and go again! A baby does not know failure, so as we grow we tend to learn how to fail and get discouraged which starts that reinforcement of failure. We forget to use that power of to persistence when we were babies to get the results we want!!! Think how unafraid babies are! ( I have also seen young children go on scary park rides and I think well if they are getting on why can’t I) We can learn so much from this, so next time you see a new born think about that for the moment! So failure is really feedback so we can continue to improve ourselves. So by failing at things we can learn from that experience to become even better, so this is what it is all about. Think about something you are good at, were you really good at it straight away? Probably not, or even if you were good you still improved because you may have failed or not performed so well. But because you loved whatever it is so much you persisted and became much better because you chose to!
As we have said before life is like this, life does not always work out, when it doesn't what can you learn from that to make yourself better! Use failure to your advantage, so what went wrong and how can I now improve whatever it was? So this is how you can improve your confidence, so now you won’t fail because you use your failure as a learning curve to make your life and confidence even better! Failure is now on your side!
Let us recap
1) Write out your unconfident story.
2) Write out or picture your confident story. Remember “THE POWER OF CHOICE”
Destroy your unconfidence. get that picture whatever it is, rip it up or do whatever is necessary to get rid of that unconfidence using all your body so that message hits home.
3) Reinforce your new found confidence - Having that new story by your bed so you can read it each morning and everyday you are practicing it. Do something that you love to do and that you are good at so it starts to build that confident feeling/evidence. Then you can start to stretch yourself into areas which you may not have gone into before. Maybe slowly at first, but gradually, gradually you take those steps and take a bit more risk. So if you do this and you have done really well give yourself a pat on the back. If it has not worked out still give yourself a pat on the back, because you are the one who went out and did that. You actually did it, no one else was doing, I am not doing it, you are DOING IT! You are watching this video because you want to do it. I know that you can absolutely do this and I have total belief in you!
4) Failure - Remember the meaning - We never fail we learn from what we do, if it does not work out we can just do something else, we can try an alternative and make ourselves even better. Failure is now on your side!
Moving forward
One more thing I wanted to add to this is TO BE KIND TO YOURSELF. So if you get that pointy finger or negative voice saying “you are bad” etc. Remember you are a GOOD PERSON and you deserve to be treated well. If you were talking to your best friend would you treat them the same way you treat yourself by saying things like “ you are rubbish” etc. You would be there for them and encourage them and this is how you need to treat yourself! If you are thinking negative thoughts, give yourself a chance and be kind to yourself if things do not work out, at least you tried and you can just try again. Also watch your language and how you describe yourself make sure you keep saying that “you are going for it “ “ I am going to try and do these things”. If you catch yourself saying things like “ I cant do this” etc just try and change your language into a more positive phrase so you give yourself a chance of succeeding. Remember you will believe whatever you keep telling yourself!
This stuff may not happen over night for some of you it will happen with the click of a finger, for most of you it will be a slower process. But if you work at it I promise it will give you results and that is what I want for you guys, I want you guys to succeed.
So thanks for watching and I hope this has really helped, so don't forget to like this video, and do not forget to subscribe so you get a notification when my next video has been uploaded. If you are watching on my website go to my You Tube channel click here, so you can subscribe.
Let us continue to work together and I will keep uploading stuff that you can use; feel free to comment on the videos, catch up with me on Facebook and Twitter etc, the links can be found on my home page on the top right hand corner. Click here to go straight to the home page.
Continue to be BRILLIANT, I know you can do it, don't forget I am always here by coming back to the video. So get out there and be CONFIDENT. Share your amazing stories with me and let me know how you get on.
Thanks all for watching you are all AMAZING!!!
Are you a Victim or Navigator? Find out here!
Another transcript! Be amazing with some more extras for you as usual. Enjoy :)
How to release yourself from a victim mindset
Victim vs Navigator
Thanks to all you guys for checking in with me again, so welcome back and welcome to all you new guys who are tuning in to my channel so keep up the good work. So I hope you guys have worked on the stuff we have covered before in the previous videos. So keep that going; new guys check out my previous videos (so you can get up to speed) carry out the exercises and let me know how you all get on too. So welcome to all of you to this positive place so you can really improve what you are doing.
My Mission
My mission is simple “ to help as many of you as possible” (I wonder if you spotted the tiny mistake here let me know, it just shows that we are all human) and this is all I want to do. So really I am just on a mission to help as many of you as I can; so what would be great is that if you think these videos add value, why not share them with others, and why not go and speak to others about the ideas that you have learned. It is vital that you do this so you can actually practice explaining to others how you have learned from the videos; when you start to explain the concepts to other people you will gain an even better understanding. So just go ahead and try it, see what happens and see how that feels to you when you have explained these ideas to other people.
A true story for you
In this video I would like to share a little story with you. I was coaching someone just last week and they are very successful person at work and they are at a high level, even though they are at that level they still found that they were feeling really low and out of sorts. When I coached this person I introduced them to being able to identify were they were in terms of their thinking. This is a really simple tool you can use to great effect. So in this video we are going to talk about Victim vs Navigator. At the end of the session they were able to see where they were and were then able to use their strengths to lift them out of a low position and back into a state of productivity and become very, very motivated!
Victim vs Navigator
This is something that I picked up many years ago and I also researched the internet to see if I could find the founder of this tool, but I have not really found anything about it. So you guys are getting this first hand and those of you who discover this are going to be in the minority and are really going to have a massive advantage over others. So unless you have read about or you found it by pure luck, ( by the way you may have found your way here that way, so congratulations to you!) finding any info on this is, is really difficult, so today you may have just one the lottery in terms of valuable information that can really help you!!
So I am giving this to you and I hope this will be massively helpful to you, as I said I have not really found much about it, I could not even find the authors name whoever he or she was/is; in my opinion they have come up with an absolute gem of a tool that can really help you, and it is really simple use when you feel in a particular way. For example you may be feeling low and this may help you understand which mode you are in when you feel that way.
So it is all about how you are feeling at the time; if you are at work and you are feeling low or if you are at work going through the motions or you feel totally empowered, with this tool you will be able to recognise where you are and will be able to reflect as to how you are feeling and where you think you are.
Victim
So what is it that we are talking about! So let us take an instance; this does relate to work but it can be related to other areas too. But let as say you are at work and all you are thinking of is “ahhhhh it is all their fault, this is all their fault, this is nothing to do with me, you know they have done this and look at me I am in this position because of them!” (do you recognise this state?)
What you need to ask is how is this state impacting on you? When you say “ it is not fair” or someone else is doing something and I have no influence on what is happening; what you are actually talking about here is something called the VICTIM MODE! What you are doing here is that you are saying I have no control of the situation so there is nothing that you can do, you just go on moaning about it or you just have to blame someone else for the predicament that you are in.
This is what is called the VICTIM MODE, this is a really de-motivating state to be in as none of us should really want to be in this mode, but sometimes we do not even realise we are playing the part of the victim. So this allows you to take a step back; so when I coached the person I was telling you about, I asked them where they felt they were according to the tool, they did identify that they were in the victim mode. I was able to feedback the language they were using e.g. blaming others for the position they were in! This enabled them to see what was happening and were subsequently able to take control back to gain empowerment and to move themselves forward. They were able to choose to take control of their actions to start to move to where they wanted to be rather than to place blame on other areas, and therefore let go of their responsibility to run their life. With this tool they were able to take back that responsibility and to start to take actions that would empower them to start moving toward where they wanted to be.
This is what I would like you to do when you find yourself blaming others and feel that you have no empowerment at all. Just think about it for a moment are you in Victim mode? If so what could you do to start to change things? What motivates you and gets you going? So even if a bad thing is happening to you, you can deal with this in a positive way which will lead you onto the next steps. When you are in this mode you then need to start to think about how you can take control of what YOU do! This is what I talked about in my previous video where you have the power of choice! Choose not to be a victim and start doing things that will help you If you hate your job, change it. If you do not like you boss perhaps make an effort to like them, if this is not possible try and move departments, but do something that is going to start to process of moving you out of the VICTIM MODE!
You can use the GROW model to help you with this click here.
Survivor
The next stage is called SURVIVOR. Now when you are in work or at home or whenever you are just doing enough to get by. You will just hit the targets that are required or just do enough so you do not get noticed or you are just staying underneath the radar. So a question to ask yourself are you really engaged with what you are doing? Whether it is work, home, are you just going with it and do you feel empty? When you feel like this it is called surviving. You are just saying “ I am going through life and I am just going to survive, I am just going to keep my head above water or, you know it is alright” In your heart of hearts you will know that you are just surviving, you are not going out there and really living or smashing it. You are not living your life and you are not going to be a high performer. You really want to be living your life to the full so that you are happy! If you are at work and you are just surviving; just like the victim phase you are not happy you just feel uuuuugh and a bit deflated.
Victim - is where you blame everything else and relinquish responsibility for your life.
Survivor - Doing what you are told just being complaint with everything and not going over and above with anything. This means just doing the necessary. In this mode you are not going to do anything off your own back or take the initiative, you are just going to do what you have to do stay quietly underneath that radar. This is not really helping you because you really want to be happy.
Navigator
So how do we get to the next stage? Well, the next stage is where you want to be! I do not know whether you have watched Bear Grylls, but he calls this next stage thriving! He calls it surviving then thriving! What he means by thriving is you're really making a difference, you're putting on the decorative features of your life you really care about. When they did the island show you could tell who was thriving! As opposed to surviving which was just surviving the island i.e. just getting enough to eat etc, the result of thriving was they were getting enough food water etc, but the thriving part is that they were decorating their camps and actually enjoying the experience. They were living their lives and were happy doing it! The ladies had decorated the camp with shells and really made it homely, The men had transformed their camp into a pub called the something and trotter ( sorry could not remember the exact name, perhaps you guys can help?) So both the ladies and the men were learning to thrive in their environment. So this mode is called the NAVIGATOR.
So if you are in your victim mode or survival mode what you want to do is get to Navigator! So what you are doing is taking a situation say from victim mode or survivor, then you are deciding to take control of what you do! You are making a choice; you are saying “I am going to do something about this!” “ I am going to make this thing happen!” So if you are in a job you really hate what are you going to do? Are you going to apply for another job? Or is it a chat with your manager about what is going on and working things through with them so you can progress and start to make things work so you can start to enjoy your work! Asking you manager what you need to do to progress so you can start getting some satisfaction! If your manager does not believe in you may need to leave! But at least then you will be happy, it may be scary at first but at least you will be on a road where you can start to be happy and start to find something you really want to do. I just want you guys to find something that makes you really happy.
There is nothing worse than going to work or another environment where you do not actually want to go but you feel you have to go! I want you to go somewhere or be somewhere where you are going to say “ I am going to love doing this and I love what I do”
I feel I am really lucky being able to do these videos for you and do the things I do like coaching people, that is because you just have to make that choice and run with it. Yes, sometimes it is scary and we all get scared. I have been in all those modes you are talking about, I have been in victim mode where I have blamed other people for stuff and not taken control of what I was doing! In one instance people were checking my work and they were giving me all sorts of criticism about the work. I really hated the way they gave me the feedback, but actually when I looked at it from a different perspective to try to get to that navigator mode I thought what actually are they saying? What is the information they are telling me to make me be better, when I looked at it there was information that I could use to make my work better. They had picked things up that could make me better. (even though I did not like they way they delivered the news; yes I am sensitive to this too) So I decided to take that information and do something with it, I was going to correct what they said was wrong ( in that moment I was deciding to take control rather than blame them for delivering the bad news!) I was going to go above that and beyond what they were expecting, so the next time they looked at my work they would be impressed! Hey presto the next time they looked at my work they were really impressed and hence the rest is history!
That is what I am saying today, is that when you get to navigator mode it is all about the situation? What mode are you in? Identifying that, are you in victim or survivor mode ( if you are in navigator then great :)) victim blaming others, survivor just doing enough to get by!. Navigator making plans and getting where you want to be. Sometimes you will say I want to do this or that but sometimes the route is not straight as is life, (because life happens!) but I promise you if you stay committed and you make plans and take action you will get to where you want to be eventually!
It just may be that you need to chunk it down, for example if you want to be in a high executive position or do the job you love, start to make some plans but break it down.
What do you need to do first to start to move you towards that? Is it that you need to be better at your current job? It may be that you need to find a job! What is it? What is it that you could do differently now that could really make it start to happen? By doing and asking these types of questions of yourself you will get the energy and that is what I am talking about. I talked about this in my previous videos, especially the one about the moaning clubs! So it really just feeds into that, so I am putting this video in that section so it follows on and makes sense for you,
This video is on YouTube so if you are on YouTube then great, and you are on the website great, check out all the free tools in the free tools section.
Navigator is really about making plans, using the power of choice and deciding to take responsibility for what you do. Yes, and some days it is going to be difficult and you just need to push through that; as I said in my last video if things get tough be kind to yourself I do not want you to beat yourself up for not doing stuff, just go again the next day and start again. This will be a learning curve for you So make your plans slowly but surely and at your pace; some of you as I said before will take off and achieve things very quickly, for most of you it will take a little bit longer. As long as you continue to move forward and take small actions each day, by the following year you will notice a MASSIVE difference!
So I hope this all made sense and I hope it has really helped.
Re-cap-
Victim - If you are in that situation you blame others reflect on this and think about whether there is anything you can do to get into Navigator mode.
Survivor - Just doing enough to get by again reflect, are you just getting by? Is there anything you can do to be happy and to really live the life you want to live?
Remember you are the expert on you, you know yourself better than anybody. You know what works for and want does not. Self work is important I do it everyday and it is a great way to stay focused on what you want to achieve. Making sure you take those actions everyday that will take you to where you want to be. For example comments from you guys helps me to be better!
Navigator - This is where you are pushing ahead making plans, you are fired up, fire in your belly, bang, bang bang ( do the hand slaps they really help, well they work for me!!) you are hitting everything. You are seeing opportunities, as I said the person I coached as soon as they realised which mode they were in they said “Joe I feel so much more positive now coming out of this" and that day they were picking up different opportunities, a massive difference from the previous day and they came up to me saying that they were able to spot so many more opportunities. The reason for this is that your mind is in a different place and you will notice different things that will help you get to where you want to be.
If you are in a victim mode or survivor mode you are not going to have that intuition, because your brain is not looking for it, all of your brain power is focused on doing things to blame (victim) or survive. If in survival mode you're telling yourself “I just need to survive, I just need to survive” and that is what you will get, there will be no opportunities! When you are navigating you are looking for different opportunities; when you are thriving the example previously stated you might be saying “let is decorate the camp to make ourselves feel better” let us have a chat and a fun time; we have done all the hard work let us reward ourselves. This then means doing things that make a difference and make your life worth living because you are enjoying what you are doing! It may be that you are making things more efficient by catching more fish (to use the example of Bear Grylls) In your situation it may be let us make a plan to get that promotion or start to look for that job and redo my CV!
Whatever it takes you will be taking those small steps each day and in the end it will take you there.
Don’t forget to LIKE, this video (go to YouTube if you are on my website!) SUBSCRIBE AND COMMENT. I am quite happy for you to comment as I have said before go and check out my other social media which is on the front page of my website.
So go with it guys you are amazing, everyone of you out there that are watching these videos have something unique to offer the world. What I want you to do is to bring that out and share it with the world. Whether it is doing YouTube videos like me, whatever it is just DO IT! You have nothing to lose; by trying those things. The worst that can happen is you will be in exactly the same position as you were before. If you do something then I guarantee you would have moved on and learned something. So learn something new everyday, do something different, I know it can be scary, we all get scared but don't let that stop you! Don't let the fear stop you from being where you want to be
So don't forget LIKE, SUBSCRIBE AND COMMENT, sign up to my newsletter. Go for it and let me know how you get on; So until next time BE BRILLIANT!!
Victim vs Navigator
Thanks to all you guys for checking in with me again, so welcome back and welcome to all you new guys who are tuning in to my channel so keep up the good work. So I hope you guys have worked on the stuff we have covered before in the previous videos. So keep that going; new guys check out my previous videos (so you can get up to speed) carry out the exercises and let me know how you all get on too. So welcome to all of you to this positive place so you can really improve what you are doing.
My Mission
My mission is simple “ to help as many of you as possible” (I wonder if you spotted the tiny mistake here let me know, it just shows that we are all human) and this is all I want to do. So really I am just on a mission to help as many of you as I can; so what would be great is that if you think these videos add value, why not share them with others, and why not go and speak to others about the ideas that you have learned. It is vital that you do this so you can actually practice explaining to others how you have learned from the videos; when you start to explain the concepts to other people you will gain an even better understanding. So just go ahead and try it, see what happens and see how that feels to you when you have explained these ideas to other people.
A true story for you
In this video I would like to share a little story with you. I was coaching someone just last week and they are very successful person at work and they are at a high level, even though they are at that level they still found that they were feeling really low and out of sorts. When I coached this person I introduced them to being able to identify were they were in terms of their thinking. This is a really simple tool you can use to great effect. So in this video we are going to talk about Victim vs Navigator. At the end of the session they were able to see where they were and were then able to use their strengths to lift them out of a low position and back into a state of productivity and become very, very motivated!
Victim vs Navigator
This is something that I picked up many years ago and I also researched the internet to see if I could find the founder of this tool, but I have not really found anything about it. So you guys are getting this first hand and those of you who discover this are going to be in the minority and are really going to have a massive advantage over others. So unless you have read about or you found it by pure luck, ( by the way you may have found your way here that way, so congratulations to you!) finding any info on this is, is really difficult, so today you may have just one the lottery in terms of valuable information that can really help you!!
So I am giving this to you and I hope this will be massively helpful to you, as I said I have not really found much about it, I could not even find the authors name whoever he or she was/is; in my opinion they have come up with an absolute gem of a tool that can really help you, and it is really simple use when you feel in a particular way. For example you may be feeling low and this may help you understand which mode you are in when you feel that way.
So it is all about how you are feeling at the time; if you are at work and you are feeling low or if you are at work going through the motions or you feel totally empowered, with this tool you will be able to recognise where you are and will be able to reflect as to how you are feeling and where you think you are.
Victim
So what is it that we are talking about! So let us take an instance; this does relate to work but it can be related to other areas too. But let as say you are at work and all you are thinking of is “ahhhhh it is all their fault, this is all their fault, this is nothing to do with me, you know they have done this and look at me I am in this position because of them!” (do you recognise this state?)
What you need to ask is how is this state impacting on you? When you say “ it is not fair” or someone else is doing something and I have no influence on what is happening; what you are actually talking about here is something called the VICTIM MODE! What you are doing here is that you are saying I have no control of the situation so there is nothing that you can do, you just go on moaning about it or you just have to blame someone else for the predicament that you are in.
This is what is called the VICTIM MODE, this is a really de-motivating state to be in as none of us should really want to be in this mode, but sometimes we do not even realise we are playing the part of the victim. So this allows you to take a step back; so when I coached the person I was telling you about, I asked them where they felt they were according to the tool, they did identify that they were in the victim mode. I was able to feedback the language they were using e.g. blaming others for the position they were in! This enabled them to see what was happening and were subsequently able to take control back to gain empowerment and to move themselves forward. They were able to choose to take control of their actions to start to move to where they wanted to be rather than to place blame on other areas, and therefore let go of their responsibility to run their life. With this tool they were able to take back that responsibility and to start to take actions that would empower them to start moving toward where they wanted to be.
This is what I would like you to do when you find yourself blaming others and feel that you have no empowerment at all. Just think about it for a moment are you in Victim mode? If so what could you do to start to change things? What motivates you and gets you going? So even if a bad thing is happening to you, you can deal with this in a positive way which will lead you onto the next steps. When you are in this mode you then need to start to think about how you can take control of what YOU do! This is what I talked about in my previous video where you have the power of choice! Choose not to be a victim and start doing things that will help you If you hate your job, change it. If you do not like you boss perhaps make an effort to like them, if this is not possible try and move departments, but do something that is going to start to process of moving you out of the VICTIM MODE!
You can use the GROW model to help you with this click here.
Survivor
The next stage is called SURVIVOR. Now when you are in work or at home or whenever you are just doing enough to get by. You will just hit the targets that are required or just do enough so you do not get noticed or you are just staying underneath the radar. So a question to ask yourself are you really engaged with what you are doing? Whether it is work, home, are you just going with it and do you feel empty? When you feel like this it is called surviving. You are just saying “ I am going through life and I am just going to survive, I am just going to keep my head above water or, you know it is alright” In your heart of hearts you will know that you are just surviving, you are not going out there and really living or smashing it. You are not living your life and you are not going to be a high performer. You really want to be living your life to the full so that you are happy! If you are at work and you are just surviving; just like the victim phase you are not happy you just feel uuuuugh and a bit deflated.
Victim - is where you blame everything else and relinquish responsibility for your life.
Survivor - Doing what you are told just being complaint with everything and not going over and above with anything. This means just doing the necessary. In this mode you are not going to do anything off your own back or take the initiative, you are just going to do what you have to do stay quietly underneath that radar. This is not really helping you because you really want to be happy.
Navigator
So how do we get to the next stage? Well, the next stage is where you want to be! I do not know whether you have watched Bear Grylls, but he calls this next stage thriving! He calls it surviving then thriving! What he means by thriving is you're really making a difference, you're putting on the decorative features of your life you really care about. When they did the island show you could tell who was thriving! As opposed to surviving which was just surviving the island i.e. just getting enough to eat etc, the result of thriving was they were getting enough food water etc, but the thriving part is that they were decorating their camps and actually enjoying the experience. They were living their lives and were happy doing it! The ladies had decorated the camp with shells and really made it homely, The men had transformed their camp into a pub called the something and trotter ( sorry could not remember the exact name, perhaps you guys can help?) So both the ladies and the men were learning to thrive in their environment. So this mode is called the NAVIGATOR.
So if you are in your victim mode or survival mode what you want to do is get to Navigator! So what you are doing is taking a situation say from victim mode or survivor, then you are deciding to take control of what you do! You are making a choice; you are saying “I am going to do something about this!” “ I am going to make this thing happen!” So if you are in a job you really hate what are you going to do? Are you going to apply for another job? Or is it a chat with your manager about what is going on and working things through with them so you can progress and start to make things work so you can start to enjoy your work! Asking you manager what you need to do to progress so you can start getting some satisfaction! If your manager does not believe in you may need to leave! But at least then you will be happy, it may be scary at first but at least you will be on a road where you can start to be happy and start to find something you really want to do. I just want you guys to find something that makes you really happy.
There is nothing worse than going to work or another environment where you do not actually want to go but you feel you have to go! I want you to go somewhere or be somewhere where you are going to say “ I am going to love doing this and I love what I do”
I feel I am really lucky being able to do these videos for you and do the things I do like coaching people, that is because you just have to make that choice and run with it. Yes, sometimes it is scary and we all get scared. I have been in all those modes you are talking about, I have been in victim mode where I have blamed other people for stuff and not taken control of what I was doing! In one instance people were checking my work and they were giving me all sorts of criticism about the work. I really hated the way they gave me the feedback, but actually when I looked at it from a different perspective to try to get to that navigator mode I thought what actually are they saying? What is the information they are telling me to make me be better, when I looked at it there was information that I could use to make my work better. They had picked things up that could make me better. (even though I did not like they way they delivered the news; yes I am sensitive to this too) So I decided to take that information and do something with it, I was going to correct what they said was wrong ( in that moment I was deciding to take control rather than blame them for delivering the bad news!) I was going to go above that and beyond what they were expecting, so the next time they looked at my work they would be impressed! Hey presto the next time they looked at my work they were really impressed and hence the rest is history!
That is what I am saying today, is that when you get to navigator mode it is all about the situation? What mode are you in? Identifying that, are you in victim or survivor mode ( if you are in navigator then great :)) victim blaming others, survivor just doing enough to get by!. Navigator making plans and getting where you want to be. Sometimes you will say I want to do this or that but sometimes the route is not straight as is life, (because life happens!) but I promise you if you stay committed and you make plans and take action you will get to where you want to be eventually!
It just may be that you need to chunk it down, for example if you want to be in a high executive position or do the job you love, start to make some plans but break it down.
What do you need to do first to start to move you towards that? Is it that you need to be better at your current job? It may be that you need to find a job! What is it? What is it that you could do differently now that could really make it start to happen? By doing and asking these types of questions of yourself you will get the energy and that is what I am talking about. I talked about this in my previous videos, especially the one about the moaning clubs! So it really just feeds into that, so I am putting this video in that section so it follows on and makes sense for you,
This video is on YouTube so if you are on YouTube then great, and you are on the website great, check out all the free tools in the free tools section.
Navigator is really about making plans, using the power of choice and deciding to take responsibility for what you do. Yes, and some days it is going to be difficult and you just need to push through that; as I said in my last video if things get tough be kind to yourself I do not want you to beat yourself up for not doing stuff, just go again the next day and start again. This will be a learning curve for you So make your plans slowly but surely and at your pace; some of you as I said before will take off and achieve things very quickly, for most of you it will take a little bit longer. As long as you continue to move forward and take small actions each day, by the following year you will notice a MASSIVE difference!
So I hope this all made sense and I hope it has really helped.
Re-cap-
Victim - If you are in that situation you blame others reflect on this and think about whether there is anything you can do to get into Navigator mode.
Survivor - Just doing enough to get by again reflect, are you just getting by? Is there anything you can do to be happy and to really live the life you want to live?
Remember you are the expert on you, you know yourself better than anybody. You know what works for and want does not. Self work is important I do it everyday and it is a great way to stay focused on what you want to achieve. Making sure you take those actions everyday that will take you to where you want to be. For example comments from you guys helps me to be better!
Navigator - This is where you are pushing ahead making plans, you are fired up, fire in your belly, bang, bang bang ( do the hand slaps they really help, well they work for me!!) you are hitting everything. You are seeing opportunities, as I said the person I coached as soon as they realised which mode they were in they said “Joe I feel so much more positive now coming out of this" and that day they were picking up different opportunities, a massive difference from the previous day and they came up to me saying that they were able to spot so many more opportunities. The reason for this is that your mind is in a different place and you will notice different things that will help you get to where you want to be.
If you are in a victim mode or survivor mode you are not going to have that intuition, because your brain is not looking for it, all of your brain power is focused on doing things to blame (victim) or survive. If in survival mode you're telling yourself “I just need to survive, I just need to survive” and that is what you will get, there will be no opportunities! When you are navigating you are looking for different opportunities; when you are thriving the example previously stated you might be saying “let is decorate the camp to make ourselves feel better” let us have a chat and a fun time; we have done all the hard work let us reward ourselves. This then means doing things that make a difference and make your life worth living because you are enjoying what you are doing! It may be that you are making things more efficient by catching more fish (to use the example of Bear Grylls) In your situation it may be let us make a plan to get that promotion or start to look for that job and redo my CV!
Whatever it takes you will be taking those small steps each day and in the end it will take you there.
Don’t forget to LIKE, this video (go to YouTube if you are on my website!) SUBSCRIBE AND COMMENT. I am quite happy for you to comment as I have said before go and check out my other social media which is on the front page of my website.
So go with it guys you are amazing, everyone of you out there that are watching these videos have something unique to offer the world. What I want you to do is to bring that out and share it with the world. Whether it is doing YouTube videos like me, whatever it is just DO IT! You have nothing to lose; by trying those things. The worst that can happen is you will be in exactly the same position as you were before. If you do something then I guarantee you would have moved on and learned something. So learn something new everyday, do something different, I know it can be scary, we all get scared but don't let that stop you! Don't let the fear stop you from being where you want to be
So don't forget LIKE, SUBSCRIBE AND COMMENT, sign up to my newsletter. Go for it and let me know how you get on; So until next time BE BRILLIANT!!
5 steps to getting unstuck and to getting what you want!
Your transcript; with the usual amazing extras :)
5 Steps to getting what you want by getting unstuck!
Hey guys and welcome to another one of my videos. Just to let you know it is going to be a quick video, I am going to try and make them more sharp and snappy, my whole reason for doing this is to help you.
5 steps to go from stuck to amazing!
So as you can tell by the title there are going to be 5 steps to go through, which really revolve around questions to ask yourself to help move you forward.
I would suggest that after each step you pause the video. ( this is not going to be easy, but if it was everyone would be doing this, but you are not anyone you are making a choice and choosing to be different and to move forward!)
By the end of these 5 steps you will have made a plan to move you forward to where you want to be! This is going to be amazing, so stick with it and I am sure you will get through it to get the amazing results that you want.
QUESTION 1 - What do you want?
I ask this question a lot and you know the most amazing thing, people actually do not know what they want! So this question is here to really help you; what do you want? So now you need to write down exactly what you want (be specific, so it may be that you want to loose 3 stones, it is no use putting that I want to loose weight as it is not specific enough and how will you know when you have achieved what you want!) So is it a new relationship? Is it a job? Is it to get a job? Whatever it is write down exactly what you want, it does not matter how far out there it is as long as it realistic to you and your circumstances at the moment. that is all that matters. DONT FORGET TO PAUSE THE VIDEO AND TAKW YOUR TIME OVER THE QUESTION!
QUESTION 2 - Where are you now?
This really helps you find out where you are. Think about a map and when you leave the house, do you just leave the house without having any planned destination in place and do not know where you are going? This question will show where you are on the map. Where you are now to where you want to be. Say for instance you were down in Brighton and we want to get to London, this question will tell us where about we are on the map and how close we are to our goal, being London. So whatever you want, you first need to know your starting position.
So take time with this question write down exactly what your situation is, so that will give you an idea of where you are and where you want to get to. So write it out. AGAIN PAUSE THE VIDEO!
QUESTION 3 - What COULD YOU start to do to get what you want?
This is the really fun part and the brain storming exciting session. So this question is going to really make your AMAZING BRAIN think of where you are. So by thinking about WHAT YOU WANT, this question is what COULD you start to do to get what you want?
So now it is about making that plan, so start to brain storm some ideas ( at this point it does not matter how far out they just get everything down on paper and don't stop) Some of the actions will stretch you but that is the whole point.
So you might want to be in a relationship; so one of the actions might be that you will go out at least once a week to meet new people or making an effort to talk to your friends more. If it is about getting a new job it you may decide to revitalise your CV or talking to someone about your CV so you can make it better. ( I have a guide on that too; CV TIPS) It may be that you might decide to talk to a few businesses directly, whatever it is you can absolutely do it. So take your time with it and most of all have fun creating the ideas! By the end you should have loads and loads of ideas, 20- 30, whatever it is, take your time. It might take you 30 mins to 2 hours, whatever it takes you must do this.
4. Take your top three actions & date when you are going to complete them by.
So now what I want you to do is to take three of those ideas ideas. You need to select your top three that are absolutely must do’s to get you to where you want to be.
Now with these top three I now want you to put them in order of importance, e.g, the most important first then proceed to list the others in the same way. So the top one must be completed first and when you put down a date for each of those actions, with the most important with the earliest date. The dates you put must be close to the date you started to take these steps. For example, if you put a date too far into the future then you are unlikely to do it, (or you are putting off doing it, this is called procrastination the killer of dreams!) if you do it short then you might be putting too much pressure on yourself and again you may push away from that and just not do it. ( I usually find that if this is the case excuses start popping up to not carry out the action, so watch out!) A good time frame would be about FOUR TO FIVE DAYS, from the day you place the actions into order. I would also warn that if you try to put too many actions down then again it us unlikely that you will do them. All the same three is just a guide, if this is too much then reduce it down to two or even one, this just depends on you. As long as you keep moving forward and carry out the actions, that is when you can give yourself a pat on the back!
5. Review where you are now in relation to what you want
This is a success marker, so when you do take those actions don't forget to give yourself a pat on the back, or reward yourself with something. As you have carried out some action, I know you would have done amazing, so as long as you take actions everyday it will move you forward. On occasions you may not get the results you want but at least you are doing something different, in the end I know it will work for you. Life does have its ups and downs, we are mainly aiming for the ups as I want you to succeed! So whatever happens just keep going and you will get your reward!
When you have taken the action review what happened and then repeat these 5 steps to keep evolving your plan which will keep you focused on what you want. Once you achieve the goal, then look to create another goal that continues to move you forward to what you want. You can use these 5 simple steps over and over.
This video will always be here for you so you can come back at any time and just re run the video!
You can always ping me an email as well to tell me how you are getting on or through my social media. (You guys have been amazing with that BTW)
So remember to be amazing and brilliant so don't forget to LIKE the video, SUBSCRIBE if your new that is especially important! COMMENT; I am more than happy to respond to you and I love to hear how you are getting on. IF YOU ARE WATCHING THIS ON MY WEBSITE DONT FORGET TO COME BACK HERE AFTER YOU HAVE BEEN TO YOUTUBE TO LIKE ETC :)
So until next time take care :)
Hey guys and welcome to another one of my videos. Just to let you know it is going to be a quick video, I am going to try and make them more sharp and snappy, my whole reason for doing this is to help you.
5 steps to go from stuck to amazing!
So as you can tell by the title there are going to be 5 steps to go through, which really revolve around questions to ask yourself to help move you forward.
I would suggest that after each step you pause the video. ( this is not going to be easy, but if it was everyone would be doing this, but you are not anyone you are making a choice and choosing to be different and to move forward!)
By the end of these 5 steps you will have made a plan to move you forward to where you want to be! This is going to be amazing, so stick with it and I am sure you will get through it to get the amazing results that you want.
QUESTION 1 - What do you want?
I ask this question a lot and you know the most amazing thing, people actually do not know what they want! So this question is here to really help you; what do you want? So now you need to write down exactly what you want (be specific, so it may be that you want to loose 3 stones, it is no use putting that I want to loose weight as it is not specific enough and how will you know when you have achieved what you want!) So is it a new relationship? Is it a job? Is it to get a job? Whatever it is write down exactly what you want, it does not matter how far out there it is as long as it realistic to you and your circumstances at the moment. that is all that matters. DONT FORGET TO PAUSE THE VIDEO AND TAKW YOUR TIME OVER THE QUESTION!
QUESTION 2 - Where are you now?
This really helps you find out where you are. Think about a map and when you leave the house, do you just leave the house without having any planned destination in place and do not know where you are going? This question will show where you are on the map. Where you are now to where you want to be. Say for instance you were down in Brighton and we want to get to London, this question will tell us where about we are on the map and how close we are to our goal, being London. So whatever you want, you first need to know your starting position.
So take time with this question write down exactly what your situation is, so that will give you an idea of where you are and where you want to get to. So write it out. AGAIN PAUSE THE VIDEO!
QUESTION 3 - What COULD YOU start to do to get what you want?
This is the really fun part and the brain storming exciting session. So this question is going to really make your AMAZING BRAIN think of where you are. So by thinking about WHAT YOU WANT, this question is what COULD you start to do to get what you want?
So now it is about making that plan, so start to brain storm some ideas ( at this point it does not matter how far out they just get everything down on paper and don't stop) Some of the actions will stretch you but that is the whole point.
So you might want to be in a relationship; so one of the actions might be that you will go out at least once a week to meet new people or making an effort to talk to your friends more. If it is about getting a new job it you may decide to revitalise your CV or talking to someone about your CV so you can make it better. ( I have a guide on that too; CV TIPS) It may be that you might decide to talk to a few businesses directly, whatever it is you can absolutely do it. So take your time with it and most of all have fun creating the ideas! By the end you should have loads and loads of ideas, 20- 30, whatever it is, take your time. It might take you 30 mins to 2 hours, whatever it takes you must do this.
4. Take your top three actions & date when you are going to complete them by.
So now what I want you to do is to take three of those ideas ideas. You need to select your top three that are absolutely must do’s to get you to where you want to be.
Now with these top three I now want you to put them in order of importance, e.g, the most important first then proceed to list the others in the same way. So the top one must be completed first and when you put down a date for each of those actions, with the most important with the earliest date. The dates you put must be close to the date you started to take these steps. For example, if you put a date too far into the future then you are unlikely to do it, (or you are putting off doing it, this is called procrastination the killer of dreams!) if you do it short then you might be putting too much pressure on yourself and again you may push away from that and just not do it. ( I usually find that if this is the case excuses start popping up to not carry out the action, so watch out!) A good time frame would be about FOUR TO FIVE DAYS, from the day you place the actions into order. I would also warn that if you try to put too many actions down then again it us unlikely that you will do them. All the same three is just a guide, if this is too much then reduce it down to two or even one, this just depends on you. As long as you keep moving forward and carry out the actions, that is when you can give yourself a pat on the back!
5. Review where you are now in relation to what you want
This is a success marker, so when you do take those actions don't forget to give yourself a pat on the back, or reward yourself with something. As you have carried out some action, I know you would have done amazing, so as long as you take actions everyday it will move you forward. On occasions you may not get the results you want but at least you are doing something different, in the end I know it will work for you. Life does have its ups and downs, we are mainly aiming for the ups as I want you to succeed! So whatever happens just keep going and you will get your reward!
When you have taken the action review what happened and then repeat these 5 steps to keep evolving your plan which will keep you focused on what you want. Once you achieve the goal, then look to create another goal that continues to move you forward to what you want. You can use these 5 simple steps over and over.
This video will always be here for you so you can come back at any time and just re run the video!
You can always ping me an email as well to tell me how you are getting on or through my social media. (You guys have been amazing with that BTW)
So remember to be amazing and brilliant so don't forget to LIKE the video, SUBSCRIBE if your new that is especially important! COMMENT; I am more than happy to respond to you and I love to hear how you are getting on. IF YOU ARE WATCHING THIS ON MY WEBSITE DONT FORGET TO COME BACK HERE AFTER YOU HAVE BEEN TO YOUTUBE TO LIKE ETC :)
So until next time take care :)