I craved approval from not only specific people, but from many others who I didn’t even know.For a part of my life my only focus was trying to continue to keep a perfect image of who I am because at the time I did not believe in myself. I craved approval from not only specific people, but from many others who I didn’t even know. The problem with that is that I was not focusing on the person who was desperate to be noticed. And that was me. I now know that my focus should have been with the people who truly loved and cared about me. Once I decided to make a change and put more focus on the ones who truly had my best interests at heart, then I started to put my focus more on appreciating myself and others. I was more about helping people and less about trying to seek approval. When I started helping others, something miraculously happened. I started to believe in my own worth. I started to believe that I had value, importance and good qualities in me. The best part though is I started to feel happier and realized that I am a decent person. I knew I now had a purpose. I felt free from seeking approval. I noticed how much I have struggled in my life and I came out of it a champion standing tall. I stopped worrying or caring what others thought of me. I stopped trying to please people. You will never get people who are going to approve of you, but you can approve of you 100 percent of the time. God put me with the people who were meant to be in my life. It is very important not to forget who truly is there for you at your worst, in addition to your joys. Self validation is where true happiness comes from. When you have this you become indestructible and impervious to what others do or say about you. Never seek attention from those who do very little for your life, happiness and future. They are not going to pay your bills or be there when you need them. The people who care about you will always be there for you, but most importantly, you are always with you 24|7, so you might as well appreciate, love and value yourself. Be consciously awareThe first and most important thing I want you to do is be aware that you are trying to please others so they can like and accept you. How does it make you feel that you have to continue to try to win the attention of the people who hardly reciprocate the attention back to you? When you are aware that seeking approval is quite tiring and not helpful to you or your life, then you can decide to make healthy changes. Just remember, you never have to try for those who love you unconditionally Put more focus on what truly is important to you Where your focus goes is where your energy will grow. When you start to do what you are passionate about and important in your life, then you will start to gain more confidence, and self worth. When you are constantly trying to seek the approval of someone, then you lose that focus on moving forward. Practice self lovePracticing daily affirmations every day can help you develop self love and acceptance. So here is an example of a list I carry in my wallet
-I am good enough -I am well built and attractive -I love to help others and that makes me happy. -I love and accept myself wholeheartedly - I am unique - I have gone through so much and yet I am still STANDING. I am unbreakable -I never give up -I know my worth -My happiness is not based upon other people. I want to be happy, because I choose to be happy. -I am loving and loved and that makes my life beautiful - God always has his arms wrapped around me. He lets me know that I have nothing to worry about -I am the driver of my life. Nobody is going to tell me how I should live my life. This list lets me know everything about me. I want you to make your power list of why it is so beautiful to be you. Your list is a positive reminder why you don’t need anyone to tell you how amazing you are. You already know it. You can even write it out and have it printed into a poster. Just put small little reminders of what truly makes you a wonderful person. Happiness will always come from the inside. Your greatness comes from believing in who you are from the inside. You have to believe in yourself. If you seek it from others you will be disappointed. Just remember my friends; nobody can take away your power.Start to notice that you are a pretty great person. Don’t put people above you because the truth is nobody is better than anyone. Maybe more experienced, but not better. I want you to start to value yourself without the need to undervalue. You have so much going for you, so stop trying to put your efforts into what someone has going for them. Let all your worries and situations go. Free yourself and bring peace and clarity inside of you. You deserve it. I just want you to know that you don’t need anyone to tell you just how AWESOME and AMAZING you are. So many already know it. So after reading this article, I hope you do too. God bless you and never give up. Sincerely, Danny Gautama (The Fighter) Email: dannygautamawellnessgmail.com Twitter: @DannyGautama Instagram: danny_gautama
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September 2021
AuthorJoe Noya, founder of JN Coachingtechnologies. Categories |